okay. it's been a looooonnnng while. i've been evading technology recently so i couldn't be bothered to come online and update nor could i be bothered reading those of others so currently, i'm a bit behind but i've pretty much caught up.

so, how was your christmas? (:

i won't elaborate on mine but it was pretty good and i got some pretty nice prezzies. please don't get me started on how commercial christmas is cos i'm only online to say...

i'm going off for a short getaway later today(when the sun rises) and forgive me if i'm (REALLY) uncontactable this time. haha. i'll be back on monday ;)

school's starting soon and i haven't finished my holiday homework! actually, i've barely even started. all this is a result of me choosing ignorance and intentionally not going anywhere near aspire, also, not talking to schoolmates about schoolwork at all! smart, aye? so now i'm sorta panicking.

many things have happened recently but i want to just tell you the main thing that's affected my life. i have reached my mid-life crisis about two decades in advance. yea. i have no idea why but i feel so old and what really added fuel to the fire was that i realised i haven't done anything great in my life. i feel so unaccomplished! it's a horrible hopeless feeling and i hate it. so, i've done a list! i've got about thirteen to-do's put down already and it kind of makes me feel better. you all should try it! and if you think i'm mad, don't come to me when you've reached your mid-life crisis twenty years down the road cos i'm going to be living my life to the max with no worries at all. or at least i hope so (:

okay, i'll be back soon. i'll be missing the new year so here's a
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
in advance (:
lallie | 1:39 AM

ah. i'm damn bored at home. i just watched the pirates of the carribean, dead man's cheset dvd and also about 3 more episodes of my lovely samsoon(which i exchanged my princess hours with sitz for). that was after coming home after going out with my family. i do love them and what we do together but a girl needs her friends to take her to places where her parents can't. haha.

i think sitz is completely absorbed and totally gaga over princess hours right now so there's no point contacting her ;)
as for the rest, most of them are working!
i guess i should head down to fig&olive for my favourite roast beef sandwich or perhaps, breko at bugis to visit a frazzled love (i'm praying for you, babe). maybe i shall go shopping at suntec and then walk over to millenia walk too. today i was itching to call mcdonald's delivery to order some dinner but my mum cooked.

i only have dance to look forward to. which, btw, i'm not particularly looking forward to at all. at least ish and janet are back from kl. it's at 9 but i should be there at around 830 and it's now 4am. good luck to me. i thought syf would be fun but i hate the choreo & the choreographer. rantrantrantrant.

it's supposed to be a H-O-L-I-D-A-Y, man!

hol·i·day
-noun
a time or period of exemption from any requirement, duty, assessment, etc

stupid syf.
lallie | 3:59 AM

your subtleties
they strangle me
i can't explain myself at all
and all the wants
and all the needs
all i don't want to need at all

the walls are breathing
my mind's unweaving
maybe it's best you leave me alone
a weight is lifted
on this evening
I give the final blow

when darkness turns to light
it ends tonight
it ends tonight

a falling star
least I fall alone
i can't explain what you can't explain
you're finding things that you didn't know
i look at you with such disdain

when darkness turns to light
it ends tonight
it ends tonight
just a little insight won't make this right
it's too late to fight
it ends tonight
it ends tonight

now i'm on my own side
it's better than being on your side
it's my fault when you're blind
it's better that I see it through your eyes

all these thoughts locked inside
now you're the first to know
lallie | 3:38 AM

random thought of the day;
when i finally get the guts (&also a slimmer face) i shall rebond my hair and dye it black.

not that i'm not grateful for what God has given me, just for fun.
but then i might ruin my hair forevermore. hmmm...

/

met up with the girlies todayyyy! a little to shortlived though. again soon, yes? (:

/

i'm so bored at home! i think maybe it's time to start studying. bleagh.
lallie | 2:26 AM

today i went out with sitz. it was good. we actually planned to shop around arab street but we kept driving round and round and couldn't find a parking lot. however, that was the best part of today. just talking in the car. we sounded like a pair of petty bitches most of the time but it's better letting it out then keeping it all in and waiting till we explode.

when we finally gave up on arab street, we went down to parkway to just look around. nothing that great there but there were free drinks at starbucks! we donated some money though otherwise we'd be a typical basket-like singaporean just in it for the freebies. haha. boy, was the queue long.
i'm such a weirdo. i don't drink coffee so everytime i go to coffee bean/starbucks i always order pure vanilla ice blended/vanilla frapp :D

/

i'm so proud of myself. i've finished volume 1 of pride and prejudice which is about half of the book. ah. i kinda like it actually. i'm a bit too into it though cos i downloaded the pride&prejudice movie with keira knightly in it and am waiting till i can get my hands on the bride&prejudice one(for fun). not to mention that i also have the BBC's pride&prejudice dvd set with colin firth in it(swoon swoon) & that's from last time, okay? i'm not that kiasu (:

/

i don't want to be a side dish! i wanna be the cutlery! :(
-think about it.
*winks at sitz
lallie | 11:53 PM

okay. it's time for an update.
last week was tiring. most of the days went like this, out all night and back home in the morning to sleep. so my timing's all screwed up. haha. somehow it made me think of england cos they're 7 hours behind so it seems like the appropriate time to sleep and wake up if i were there.

anyway, clubbing was okay but i don't think i'll wanna go again anytime soon. really. mos on sunday was okay, it made me realise that 9 or even 10 is really early. cocolatte was an interesting experience. kinda small, had dancing poles and cute bartenders but the gays there were very off-putting. dxo on wednesday was the best. it was actually tpjc's after prom party but sab and i crashed to meet naz. music was really good and i guess since it was a booked party it wasn't so scary. the smoove room at mos after that was not so enjoyable cos of the guys who started moving in on us, especially to sab and naz. we tried gotham penthouse and it was so lame. they were playing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." and there were less than 10 people there? maybe even less than 5. so yep, that'll be the end of my club-scapades for now. maybe in the future if we go with a big group i'll consider cos where's the fun without the friends right? (:





prom was on thursday. it was fun despite my earlier qualms about it not being my prom and all but i still enjoyed myself cos theoretically, it would've been my prom if i hadn't got myself retained. haha. so many gorgeous people who were great company too. the only things that sucked were the food, cos they gave the muslims things you could find at any malay wedding, and that at the end only a handful went to the dancefloor. after it ended we walked down to the esplanade and sat down at a loss for what to do. in the end we decided to walk all the way to cineleisure. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? from the esplanade! i couldn't stand my heels so i just took them off and lifted my dress a little and walked barefoot all the way there. i didn't mind though. it hurt much less than what i would have imagined my feet would end up if i had worn those darned heels. we intended to watch a movie or something but by the time we had reached, the cinema was closed. luckily the pool place was open so we played pool until 5 i think and then headed to the macs and lido for breakfast. after all that we took a long bus ride home and i reached home at around 8? damn tired but i enjoyed myself so never mind.

PHOTOS!


&all


chicas


pseudo-mafia


waiting for chow

okay. better get some sleep now. ciao!
lallie | 3:20 AM

hello love,
i know you're feeling somewhat neglected and all and i'm really sorry for it but after prom i had to deal with the aunt's wedding and i couldn't not help no matter how much i didn't want to be there so give me a chance will you? i'm going to try to make time and to make time i'll tell you when i'm not free in the near future so that furthur disappointments can be avoided.

i have dance on the;
8th(till 1700)

11th}
12th}(till 1600)
13th}

20th}(till 1200)
22nd}

28th(till 1200)
29th(till 1630)
subject to change but for now this is it and my only current commitments so we'll work around this okayy?

chill babe. don't always think the world's against you cos it's not (:
lallie | 11:00 PM

so many things have happened but i can't go into all of it now. i'm so sleep deprived. it's 5 am and i haven't slept since yesterday. help out with the wedding thingy again today at around 8? uggghhhh. i practically haven't slept all week. long nights out clubbing and prom and now this wedding business. can i just let my whole body system crash next week?

thing is i can't sleep! my thoughts are eating me from the inside. i go around looking for scraps of paper and write and write with my SRJC pen. its the only thing that gets me to sleep at night/morn. i think i'm depressed.
lallie | 5:40 AM