[[* i'm spinning around; move out of my way x) ]]

shakespeare under the stars

2007-05-07T00:20:00.000+08:00

the weekend has been good! maybe too good though. i only touched a bit of econs and hardly did anything else. i need someone to scare me more cos evidently, i'm not scared enough.

SPOILER ALERT
i watched spidey 3 on saturday and was so excited, i don't know why. when i finally watched it, i have to say i didn't get what i expected. firstly, it was kinda slow and i couldn't not think about it cos we were sitting in the second row and my back was killin me. haha. and kirsten dunst sang! i never knew she could and after hearing her, i know it is with good reason. she's not the best singer to say the least. and toby mguire is not the best dancer. omg. if girls thought that was hot i can only imagine what is not. it was entertaining however so i enjoyed myself laughing AT them. the good parts were the effects, like totally blew my mind and james franco (is that his name? aiya, the guy who plays harry) is so hot please! i think the reason i cried was cos he died at the end and it was just too much for me. talking about crying, there were WAY too much tears for my liking. but other than that it was quite an okay movie.
DON'T SAY I DIDN'T TELL YOU!

i just came back home from Midsummer Night's Dream at fort canning and it was really good. i really enjoyed myself and that surprised me cos i couldn't help sleeping during some parts of shakespeare's R&J in england last year. but then again, it could have been the jet lag. hahaha. it was a really successful innovative idea holding it in the park. despite the heat, i loved the atmosphere and thought it quite romantic. now where's a boyfriend when i need one? hurhur. oooh and the ice-cream fauzi brought made the whole experience even sweeter (pun intended) :))

i might not be going to school tomorrow, errr, today. just a side thought. hahaha

it's time

2007-05-03T20:49:00.000+08:00

helloooooo.
i realise i better update now before my blog fades into oblivion. hurhurhur. recent happenings...

GOLD WITH HONOURS!!!!!!!

omg omg omg. i was so happy when i got the news during econs lecture i was practically shaking and couldn't concentrate anymore. hahaha. all those late nights, killer trainings, bruises, sweat and perhaps a few frustrated tears were ALL WORTH IT! :) as crazy as i think my instructor is, i cannot say we could have done this without him. his choreo really helped us and i shall appreciate the crazy genius that he is. thank you thank you for the congratulatories :)))

i also went to see sabbie in a play down at zouk, the day i met the prince. naz and i were so proud of you, babe! loved that you got more air-time (saw what we wrote in the guest book? heh) and the 'dominatrix' part was sexxyyyyy!
naz and i didn't stay long for the after-party cos a) we were tired and b) old flirty men freak me out. i don't know how much they do for naz though ;) kidding kidding!
oh sab! i forgot to pass you your belated belated bday prezzie. next time okay? i hope you'll love it but even if you don't, i don't mind holding on to it. haha :)))

common test results are almost all out and surprisingly, i'm quite happy. i jumped 3 grades for both physics and econs from the last common test so i know i'm doing something right! maths will be maths but there's the mid-years to work towards and right now i'm only waiting for lit and gp. i really have no idea how i'll do for lit because it's one of those subjects so i'll just hope for the best and expect the worst. my anticipation to get back gp is tainted with some foreboding because your gp tutor telling you that something was your, and i quote, 'downfall', in your essay does not carry any hopes of getting a good grade. we'll see.

anyways, until the next time i post i shall be busying myself taking on the persona of a geek because a levels are in 5 months people! 5 months for 5 subjects! eeeeeeeeeeeeekkkkk!

where rainbows end - cecelia ahern

2007-04-14T22:29:00.000+08:00

omg. i am so emo and my eyes are so puffy.
i don't want to find my soul mate when i'm in my 50's! :(

it's funny how you can find beauty out of something so miserable :)

2007-03-25T21:09:00.000+08:00

helloooo!
goodness, my nose is dripping like a faucet and i am contemplating not going to school tomorrow but i know that i will die so most probably i shall go la. unless it gets worse.... heeheehee. but even if i don't go to school i'll still have to go for dance. eeee! my life is less than rosy.

past events i can think of are Love Through a Glass Eye and Phantom of the Opera. the first of which was a great success. really. i am so proud i got to perform up there with so many other great talents. friends who are wondering, "love through a glass what?!" i didn't publicise too much cos i didn't want you to see me as it was nerve-wrecking enough as it was. haha.
Phantom was great but something happened at the beginning that made the experience quite disappointing. really. i have never felt so crushed over a show before but i shall not elaborate for fear of sounding like a whiny toooot.

the new time-table is VERY draining. really. i'm surprised i survived the first week. but then again i'm sick now so that might explain something. my mum went to KL for the weekend so it's been my job to look after the men of the house. not that it's a very big job. haha. i think my mum underestimated their capabilities. hurhur. good news is that we get to eat out and enjoy good food but nothing beats mum's home-cooking so i am anxiously awaiting her return.

my pencil box is with siti! ahhhhh! actually it's not a big deal babe. i shall just raid my bro's pencil box for now. whenever you feel like passing to me tell me. haha. no pressure!

also, SABBIE! hello love! i shall post a HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY! here cos i really do feel bad for missing it but i shall meet you soon! (: <3

doll-shaped

2007-03-15T00:12:00.000+08:00

so it turns out that i have no march holiday. i have had no and will have no days off these march hols (apart from tuesday cos i was sick) because of dance, extra lessons and lit rehearsals. i am very very sad okayyyyyyy. but i guess i can't really blame anyone. it is the a level year and like the teachers never fail to remind us, we are not entitled to a social life. it's just that i don't remember my friends last year being so socially handicapped as i am now. yup. i realise now. it's me. i am my own disaster. hurhur.

hassa and dicky have gone to ns. good luck boys. you will come back alive and it is not the end of the world :)

you know what i've noticed? there are a few of these girls online who make me feel so physically inferior i really wish i was more attractive. ugh. okayyy. don't go on and say 'farah, don't be lame' etc etc but it won't stop me from feeling this way. what's even worse? is that they are actually real people. (i do not label species from hollywood as real. i have more sense than that. haha) and they have talents too!
i hate being a scorpio. really. we are very capable of intense jealousy.

anywayyyyy,
i've cut my hair! okay not the whole head of hair but just the fringe but it makes a, shall i say, dramatic difference. i go to school and people come up to me with 'omg! your hair!' etc etc. some feedback's been good, other's not so. girls seem to like it more than the guys and the most common remark i've heard so far is i look like a doll. haha. i shall be positive and take that as a compliment :)
if you haven't seen me post hair-cut yet, meet up with meeeeee!!!!

i feel oddly happy today. hmmm...
despite my eye bags coming back with a vengeance -_-

same old same old

2007-03-08T19:46:00.000+08:00

sorry for the lack of updates but i assure you all that you're not missing anything. really. my life is so mundane right now cos everything's revolving around school. but don't worry, if anything interesting does happen i will definately update. for now, don't hold your breath (:

if it interests anybody, there are about 1000+ freshmen now so can you imagine what lunch is going to be like? doesn't help that we have one of the smallest canteens in singapore -_-

ps;
i watched seducing mr perfect...

sigh... x)

dedicated to sitz & kam ;)

on a lighter note,

2007-02-21T21:41:00.000+08:00

HAPPY YEAR OF THE HOG! (:

yea, vin's nostrils are friggin' huge! :D

[and loads of other pics cos i haven't uploaded any in a looooonnnngg time;]

we had the 'corpse' shots,

poor sabbie, we're sick with grief

okay it was toooooo lame, i couldn't contain myself. i'm actually laughing my lungs out.

oooooh.. pyramid shots!

a great tumble...

almost!

yayyy!
azie had it so easy. hmmph! :p

and the just-for-fun self-timer shots...

THANK YOU FOR A GREAT DAY (:

stooooooopppppiiiiddddddd

2007-02-21T21:34:00.000+08:00

i've never felt so demoralized
it feels like deja vu
from 2 years ago
and i swore i'd never revisit that state again
it's time to pull up 'em socks.

of bicycles, frogs and a very pretty boy :]

2007-02-08T20:07:00.000+08:00

some people refer to pasir ris as the resort town but i think of it more as the death-by-bicycle town. honestly, i think if i ever do suffer a premature death, it will most probably be due to a stupid bicycle. today, i was walking home from the bus stop and 2 bicycles were coming from opposite directions and i was stuck in the middle so all i could do was suck my tummy and butt in and pray that i wouldn't get squashed. bloody bicycles.

anyway, there's this poem that one of the groups presented for our identity project;
(yes, an identity/who thing again. but you did say you didn't mind reading about anything. haha)

I'm Nobody! Who are You? by Emily Dickinson

I'm Nobody! Who are you?
Are you - Nobody - Too?
Then there's a pair of us!
Don't tell! They'd advertise - you know!

How dreary - to be - Somebody!
How public - like a Frog -
To tell one's name-the livelong June -
To an admiring Bog!

okay, i shall not bother you with all the analysing but i can really relate to this poem. what's so great about being a 'Somebody'? by being a 'Nobody' you're far more special and take on a greater significance. however, the main thing i thought about were these group of 'frogs' in school i cannot stand. now that i see the great similarities between them and these creatures who attract unwanted attention with it's hideous sound, i can now enjoy my own private joke! heeheehee

-

SITZ! you beat me to saying this! when i was watching the most recent episode of The Arena i was thinking in my mind, 'is it only me, or does anybody else think ASHRAF SAFDAR is so incredibly hottttt?' okay maybe more of a pretty-boy but still very much swoon-worthy. and now, i know i'm not alone! ;) haha. i would've wrtitten it earlier but me being me was too lazy to go online. hehehe.

i want to end this off with,

HAPPY BELATED 19TH BIRTHDAY, BIBS!

(we shall celebrate soon, you hear? i lovvvveeee youuuu!)

who?

2007-01-25T21:49:00.000+08:00

hello! when i went online today i suddenly had a wave of nostalgia pass over me and i decided to read through all my previous posts from the first to the present. i was such a sad, depressed soul in 2005! it was my first year in SRJC and i think school definately contributed to my pathetic state. however, it was also the year i met fab fab people and the few happy moments i had were mostly thanks to them :)

hey girls, remember this? i think it was taken during the first few weeks we entered SR. (at an airport toilet. hurhur)

that year was also the first year i ever had short hair. haha. i feel like cutting it short again.

-

anyway, after today's lit identity lecture on fistful of colours, it got me wanting to know how singaporean i was so i asked my parents about it over dinner this evening. obviously, my dad couldn't help me much but i found out a lot from my mum.
my grandma's mum came over to singapore from boyan in search of a better life while still pregnant with my grandma. she worked here as a washer-woman i think. my great-grandad never followed so my great-grandma married another man here but apparently, he had a wife back in boyan and when she arrived in singapore he divorced my great-grandma leaving her to make a living for herself. the ironic thing is, they all still lived under the same roof! as for my grandad, he was of javanese decent but came here from johor and worked as a mechanic and after a few years, applied for singaporean citizenship. my mum never knew her parental grandparents so that stops there.

the sad thing is that only makes me about 3rd generation singaporean at most. i know this might sound stupid but i feel alien-ish when trying to relate to the characters in foc and am actually jealous i can't claim i descend from these singaporeans from around a century ago.

my dad told me that if it were any consolation, my having an english dad, a malay-singaporean mum and growing up in hong kong, makes me a great specimen of a result of globalisation. haha. ya. some consolation.

actually, i'm not too hung up over this. i liked hearing these stories BUT it's a pity my history can't be more colourful.

toodles!

it's true, romance is dead (i shot it in the heart, not the head)

2007-01-17T20:20:00.000+08:00

okay, emo-ness aside...
it's time i updated to let non-SRJCians know i'm still alive.
HELLO!
it's so sad that i haven't seen you all in so long. the most that i got was about 1 hour with azimah on sat and of that about 5 minutes with sab? ha! & i haven't seen any ex-SRJCians at all (except dicky for about 6 seconds last mon i think) :( sitz!!!! go check your e-mail k?

so, school's taking over my life. it seems like the recent end-of-year holidays were but only a (really)distant memory. i only finish school at around 7 or 8 everyday except for thurs which is at 530. really really tired and i find it so hard finding time to study and do homework. i have a math lecture test this friday!(pray for me, fiq!) i can't complain too much cos some from other cca's have it worse than i do but the real problem here is i am really the worst person at juggling all these things. i don't even go online much anymore. haha.
i was thinking of meeting people on saturday but there's going to be a dance camp this fri/sat -_-
so so sorry! maybe i'll see ya'll on sunday if i'm not swimming in my homework. but i have to meet fiq for tuition though ;)

i was quite bummed last friday. sitz called me when i was about to finish dance to ask me to join her for dinner. even though i was kind of shagged, i wanted to see her so i agreed but then my mum called and told me my dad was going to pick me up and said i'm tired and should go home and rest. i appreciate my parents' concern but they just don't understand the whole missing and wanting to catch up with my friends thing. i guess cos they don't have friends. hurhur. okay. maybe not but they don't really put friends on the top of their priority list. so it's kind of frustrating when i say i'm going to meet my friends and they look at me disapprovingly cos i should be using my time more productively. oh well...

anyway, even though you guys don't hear from me i miss you very muchos. i think about ya'll whenever i see a 72 bus, sit at the canteen table next to the pillar, etc etc
apple crumble shall happen soon aight!
lovelovelove! (:

you shake that ass and i just die

2007-01-04T21:12:00.000+08:00

hello evil people who are relishing my going back to school while they can stay at home/work/whathaveyou. haha

it's only the 2nd day of school but i'm so exhausted. yeah. weird. i think it's mainly to do with the game i/c thingy but it's fun too. unfortch, there are AP freshmen who i CANNOT stand but they are few and far between so yay! oh, the homework's really piling up too! exciting, no? i'm already freakin scared for the a's. haha.

the first day wasn't as bad as i thought it would be. i was actually kinda excited cos when i reached school i immediately sent my darling (EX)retainees messages which oozed with a bit too much enthusiasm. haha (hello J2 people!)

apart from that, SR has a new principal ppl! wooo! i think most are really warming up too him cos
a)he doesn't insist on girls wearing long long skirts
b)NO BELT! i am serious! even the guys don't have to wear 'em! &
c)he's not mrs kok!
so far so good but it's still the early stages so who knows? in time, we might find that he's worse. muahahaha.

azi and i had pre-school jitters so we decided to meet up yesterday after the first day. so nice to see the girls(aznazsab) cos i haven't seen them in AGES. it was a avenue of de-stressing but i was so tired when i reached home. next de-stressing session shall be saturday where we shall celebrate the last few days of lyndon's freedom and then next week i'll get to see siti(waves)!

i need HELP with maths!

okay. this entry is sooo not properly structured. haha. stress la! :p

**

2006-12-30T01:39:00.000+08:00

okay. it's been a looooonnnng while. i've been evading technology recently so i couldn't be bothered to come online and update nor could i be bothered reading those of others so currently, i'm a bit behind but i've pretty much caught up.

so, how was your christmas? (:

i won't elaborate on mine but it was pretty good and i got some pretty nice prezzies. please don't get me started on how commercial christmas is cos i'm only online to say...

i'm going off for a short getaway later today(when the sun rises) and forgive me if i'm (REALLY) uncontactable this time. haha. i'll be back on monday ;)

school's starting soon and i haven't finished my holiday homework! actually, i've barely even started. all this is a result of me choosing ignorance and intentionally not going anywhere near aspire, also, not talking to schoolmates about schoolwork at all! smart, aye? so now i'm sorta panicking.

many things have happened recently but i want to just tell you the main thing that's affected my life. i have reached my mid-life crisis about two decades in advance. yea. i have no idea why but i feel so old and what really added fuel to the fire was that i realised i haven't done anything great in my life. i feel so unaccomplished! it's a horrible hopeless feeling and i hate it. so, i've done a list! i've got about thirteen to-do's put down already and it kind of makes me feel better. you all should try it! and if you think i'm mad, don't come to me when you've reached your mid-life crisis twenty years down the road cos i'm going to be living my life to the max with no worries at all. ~~or at least i hope so~~ (:

okay, i'll be back soon. i'll be missing the new year so here's a
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
in advance (:

CALL 6777-3777!

2006-12-11T03:59:00.000+08:00

ah. i'm damn bored at home. i just watched the pirates of the carribean, dead man's cheset dvd and also about 3 more episodes of my lovely samsoon(which i exchanged my princess hours with sitz for). that was after coming home after going out with my family. i do love them and what we do together but a girl needs her friends to take her to places where her parents can't. haha.

i think sitz is completely absorbed and totally gaga over princess hours right now so there's no point contacting her ;)
as for the rest, most of them are working!
i guess i should head down to fig&olive for my favourite roast beef sandwich or perhaps, breko at bugis to visit a frazzled love (i'm praying for you, babe). maybe i shall go shopping at suntec and then walk over to millenia walk too. today i was itching to call mcdonald's delivery to order some dinner but my mum cooked.

i only have dance to look forward to. which, btw, i'm not particularly looking forward to at all. at least ish and janet are back from kl. it's at 9 but i should be there at around 830 and it's now 4am. good luck to me. i thought syf would be fun but i hate the choreo & the choreographer. rantrantrantrant.

it's supposed to be a H-O-L-I-D-A-Y, man!

hol·i·day
-noun
a time or period of exemption from any requirement, duty, assessment, etc

stupid syf.

maybe i'm better off without you

2006-12-11T03:38:00.000+08:00

your subtleties
they strangle me
i can't explain myself at all
and all the wants
and all the needs
all i don't want to need at all

the walls are breathing
my mind's unweaving
maybe it's best you leave me alone
a weight is lifted
on this evening
I give the final blow

when darkness turns to light
it ends tonight
it ends tonight

a falling star
least I fall alone
i can't explain what you can't explain
you're finding things that you didn't know
i look at you with such disdain

when darkness turns to light
it ends tonight
it ends tonight
just a little insight won't make this right
it's too late to fight
it ends tonight
it ends tonight

now i'm on my own side
it's better than being on your side
it's my fault when you're blind
it's better that I see it through your eyes

all these thoughts locked inside
now you're the first to know

shapes

2006-12-09T02:26:00.000+08:00

random thought of the day;
when i finally get the guts (&also a slimmer face) i shall rebond my hair and dye it black.

not that i'm not grateful for what God has given me, just for fun.
but then i might ruin my hair forevermore. hmmm...

/

met up with the girlies todayyyy! a little to shortlived though. again soon, yes? (:

/

i'm so bored at home! i think maybe it's time to start studying. bleagh.

out of my element

2006-12-07T23:53:00.000+08:00

today i went out with sitz. it was good. we actually planned to shop around arab street but we kept driving round and round and couldn't find a parking lot. however, that was the best part of today. just talking in the car. we sounded like a pair of petty bitches most of the time but it's better letting it out then keeping it all in and waiting till we explode.

when we finally gave up on arab street, we went down to parkway to just look around. nothing that great there but there were free drinks at starbucks! we donated some money though otherwise we'd be a typical basket-like singaporean just in it for the freebies. haha. boy, was the queue long.
i'm such a weirdo. i don't drink coffee so everytime i go to coffee bean/starbucks i always order pure vanilla ice blended/vanilla frapp :D

/

i'm so proud of myself. i've finished volume 1 of pride and prejudice which is about half of the book. ah. i kinda like it actually. i'm a bit too into it though cos i downloaded the pride&prejudice movie with keira knightly in it and am waiting till i can get my hands on the bride&prejudice one(for fun). not to mention that i also have the BBC's pride&prejudice dvd set with colin firth in it(swoon swoon) & that's from last time, okay? i'm not that kiasu (:

/

i don't want to be a side dish! i wanna be the cutlery! :(
-think about it.
*winks at sitz

flight of the owl

2006-12-07T03:20:00.000+08:00

okay. it's time for an update.
last week was tiring. most of the days went like this, out all night and back home in the morning to sleep. so my timing's all screwed up. haha. somehow it made me think of england cos they're 7 hours behind so it seems like the appropriate time to sleep and wake up if i were there.

anyway, clubbing was okay but i don't think i'll wanna go again anytime soon. really. mos on sunday was okay, it made me realise that 9 or even 10 is really early. cocolatte was an interesting experience. kinda small, had dancing poles and cute bartenders but the gays there were very off-putting. dxo on wednesday was the best. it was actually tpjc's after prom party but sab and i crashed to meet naz. music was really good and i guess since it was a booked party it wasn't so scary. the smoove room at mos after that was not so enjoyable cos of the guys who started moving in on us, especially to sab and naz. we tried gotham penthouse and it was so lame. they were playing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." and there were less than 10 people there? maybe even less than 5. so yep, that'll be the end of my club-scapades for now. maybe in the future if we go with a big group i'll consider cos where's the fun without the friends right? (:

prom was on thursday. it was fun despite my earlier qualms about it not being my prom and all but i still enjoyed myself cos theoretically, it would've been my prom if i hadn't got myself retained. haha. so many gorgeous people who were great company too. the only things that sucked were the food, cos they gave the muslims things you could find at any malay wedding, and that at the end only a handful went to the dancefloor. after it ended we walked down to the esplanade and sat down at a loss for what to do. in the end we decided to walk all the way to cineleisure. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? from the esplanade! i couldn't stand my heels so i just took them off and lifted my dress a little and walked barefoot all the way there. i didn't mind though. it hurt much less than what i would have imagined my feet would end up if i had worn those darned heels. we intended to watch a movie or something but by the time we had reached, the cinema was closed. luckily the pool place was open so we played pool until 5 i think and then headed to the macs and lido for breakfast. after all that we took a long bus ride home and i reached home at around 8? damn tired but i enjoyed myself so never mind.

PHOTOS!

&all

chicas

pseudo-mafia

waiting for chow

okay. better get some sleep now. ciao!

tick tock

2006-12-05T23:00:00.000+08:00

hello love,
i know you're feeling somewhat neglected and all and i'm really sorry for it but after prom i had to deal with the aunt's wedding and i couldn't not help no matter how much i didn't want to be there so give me a chance will you? i'm going to try to make time and to make time i'll tell you when i'm not free in the near future so that furthur disappointments can be avoided.

i have dance on the;
8th(till 1700)

11th}
12th}(till 1600)
13th}

20th}(till 1200)
22nd}

28th(till 1200)
29th(till 1630)
subject to change but for now this is it and my only current commitments so we'll work around this okayy?

chill babe. don't always think the world's against you cos it's not (:

zzzzz

2006-12-03T05:40:00.000+08:00

so many things have happened but i can't go into all of it now. i'm so sleep deprived. it's 5 am and i haven't slept since yesterday. help out with the wedding thingy again today at around 8? uggghhhh. i practically haven't slept all week. long nights out clubbing and prom and now this wedding business. can i just let my whole body system crash next week?

thing is i can't sleep! my thoughts are eating me from the inside. i go around looking for scraps of paper and write and write with my SRJC pen. its the only thing that gets me to sleep at night/morn. i think i'm depressed.

another year &perhaps a little wiser (:

2006-11-26T02:02:00.000+08:00

so i guess it's time for another post. i'm so lazy to update nowadays which is so weird. when i was supposed to be busy with studying for the promos i couldn't resist updating. now, it seems like such a hassle. i really need to get my priorities straight.

i don't wanna be too wordy today so i'll just use photos.
firstly, kamaliah's bday. sitz and i went around singapore trying to find the perfect gift and we settled on these great finds. a teal blazer and a baby doll dress. both really really cute and the dress had a beautiful print. after 3 bday for boys it was really exciting and fun finally finding something for a girl. when we surprised kam on NOVEMBER 10TH after her history a level paper at the 'jungle' near school, we were so happy and relieved to see that she loved it as much as we did!

yep, she really didn't expect a dress! when she went out with us in it though, she looked really gooooooooood! (:

so now i'll show you my bday (NOVEMBER 14TH) photos. haha. azie wanted to meet me at tamp to have dinner with me on my bday. i was kinda feeling emo on the bus on the way home after dance cos bdays aren't really a whoopadeedoo thing for me so you know what bus rides do... i started thinking about how sad it was that no one else was free cos of school or a levels and stuff so yeaa.. but i seriously didn't resent anyone for it, okayyy?

anyhoo, i went to Sakura International Buffet at TM (which despite the somwhat unglam name is kinda a swanky(chandeliers!) place. you know, for TM anyway) and surpise, surprise, who should be there but miss i-should-be-punished-cos-i'm-busy-on-your-bday, SITZ! they also surprised me with this really nicely made card which had a very interesting inside. i didn't know whether to be flattered or humiliated :D i cheered up loads after that. i had 2 of my girlfriends + good food so what else could a girl need?

the masterminds; hello loves!

the beautifuuuul card (:

azie forced us to eat OYSTERS!

ugh!

uggghhh!

UGGGGHHHHHHHH!

my bday cake(s)!

azie love

siti love

yay!

NOVEMBER 18TH was jalan raya. started off at my place and when we went to fiq's house, i got another surprise! haha. i don't know why you people don't believe me when i keep saying i didn't expect it. i was just sitting at the dining table with the girls and suddenly they came out with this mango cake. funny thing was before the cake even reached me all the candles blew out. but it didn't matter. i got this cool mod dress that i'm sure will hypnotize people when i walk and another beautiful card (really sitz, you could give hallmark a run for their money!) oh wait, before that when we were just leaving my house diki gave me a present and card. the first time in what, 4 years? haha. obviously, i was shell-shocked (btw, they were belgian chocs). and i also swear i didn't expect anything more. what's wrong with you people? :) after all that we visited more houses but really few this year cos most parents on that day weren't in. it was still fun though!

see the card?

yay again

you don't need korean dramas to cry when you have a bowl of sitz's mee pedas!

speaking of korean dramas, i finished watching princess hours recently and i love it to bits! i'm almost obsessed with it. everything reminds me of it. from prince williams to the cramp in my legs i feel when sitting cross-legged for too long. really, it's THAT bad. siti really wants to watch it at my house but i'm feeling kinda reluctant cos i don't want to let my heart go through that again. i cried buckets and i was so caught up in how romantic it was. i'm such a hopeless romantic that i try to be cynical about love so i won't expect too much. anyway, soon sitz! and azie too! a december marathon? get ready to keep 24 hours free. how bout 4 hours a day for 6 days/ 6 hours a day for 4days? haha!

okay, so much for not wanting to be wordy. typical.
i shall try to update again soon. i'm going to mos tonight and then clubbing again with my my girls on monday and wednesday. then prom's on thursday. then my aunt's wedding's on saturday&sunday. hmmm. maybe i won't update so soon after all :P
peace.

After So Long

2006-11-02T00:36:00.001+08:00

HELLO!
I know I haven't updated in ages and LOADS of things have happened since but first things first, I'M PROMOTED, BABY! *does celebratory jig
Wee! I know that most J1s who get promoted are happy about it but don't think much of it but seriously, no one appreciares being promoted more than a retainee. It's just a huge burden off one's shoulders. Mrs Kok can pour as much rain as she wants on our parade but I'm not going to let it put me off at all. The best thing is that all (save one casualty) of the retainees got promoted. Funny how we bonded so well. Must be all the dragon-boating and kayaking.
One thing that I find totally unfair though is that so many have been asked to leave! It's almost heart-breaking especially when you know some of them. 37 compared to just 5 last year is a bit too extreme don't you think? But I wish them and the retainees all the best. Could be a blessing in disuguise and they could probably excel much better with whatever they choose to do next. I never regretted retaining. I love the arts & I love this batch of J1s so it all fell into place for me.

Anywayyy. On to things that have happened..
Naz's Birthday! Was highly enjoyable and equally as scandalous. Amazing how the presence of TK ppl can make a pleasant birthday gathering so wild. I don't know if I can write what happened and maybe it wouldn't be a good idea to put up photos of what happened (not to mention that i don't have ANY photos. *stares at Aza) but it was fun. Simpang Bedok again. Good food, Sheesha (much to bday girl's delight) and company! What more could you ask for? Oh wait, presents! She got loads of nice ones, lucky girl including a fantabulous dress from Sab and me (: Haha. Good planning, Aza. See, everything worked out just fine.

Last Day of School aka Commendation Day
My class were volunteered to volunteer. Haha! Anyway, I was usher. I HATE being an usher. Really. I evolve into nerd personified. Long skirt, shirt tucked in all the way, belt(EWW!), spectacles(cos I can't see from the back of the hall) and not to mention the braces. Does that spell GEEK or what? Anyhoo.. It wasn't too bad. I'm so proud of A04. We were the top arts class and also second runner up for Most Outstanding CG. So so proud of them. The other classes can bitch and go on about how it should've been them all they want but it still doesn't change anything. So these titles mean only one thing right? YES! LOADS OF GOODIES. We had bountiful amounts of Ferroro Rocher. Ahhh. I lurrrve chocolate. Especially if it's good chocolate. Hee. All in all quite a nice way to end off the school year.

Hmmm. What's next? I guess I'll touch on Hari Raya.
Yay! End of the 30 days of fasting and on to celebrating. So many people go around telling me how much they got and it kinda sucks when you know they get like hundreds of dollars on the first day and I was way off from even $100 by a long shot. But hey, raya isn't just about the money people! Haha. Visiting and asking for forgiveness not to mention the FOOD! Mmmm. I think it's really touching seeing the family bond it almost brings tears to your eyes. I wish my nenek wasn't so sad on a day that's supposedly happy. Still, I think she's happy that we all came and showed we love her. Ah, family love (:

Lastly, Muhsin's birthday which fell on Halloween.
Okay, this was kinda stressful but we pulled it off quite well together. I shan't go into details cos the birthday boy might read this but I'll explain with photos. Haha.

So while Hassa was keeping him occupied in BK at the airport (after a whole day of studying) we were downstairs frantically getting ready and also waiting for Mr I'll-Be-There-In-15min, though it's not completely his fault, at Polar.

So when we were finally all good and ready, we went up to surprise him and save Hassa from trying to stall him for any longer. Good job, Hassa! Haha.

Definately was surpised to see us there!

Mmm.. Cake!

A Topman top! Which he liked, thank God!

If you look properly, you can see the card and the pumpkin I painstakingly cut out. Haha!

Yay! Although he's a guy of few words, he was all smiles so mission accomplished! Heh! After that we went to Simpang (I KNOW! Again! What is up with that?) and ate dinner. However, it wasn't a late night out cos these A level people needed to go back to mug their eyes out.

Oh btw, TO ALL THOSE TAKING THEIR A'S, ALL THE BEST!!!!!!!!

After so long

2006-11-02T00:36:00.000+08:00

what you don't see here: I SCREAM FOR ICE-CREAM!

2006-10-22T02:46:00.000+08:00

Buka@Samar!

So we buka-ed out again but this time at Arab Street. We found out that the place we intended to go to was WAY above our budget so we roamed around to find a different place (read: cheaper) and ended up at Samar. $15 buffet. Not toooo bad.

Pictures...

Hey girls! :)

Diggin' In

When Bahar's around, there'll always be games :D

They're more vain than girls. Really.

GROUP SHOT!

After eating and all, we headed down to Bugis to walk around. Mr my-aspiration-is-to-be-a-pro-driver challenged Kam to a Datona race putting Ben & Jerry's up for takes.

Vrooooommmm...

Guess who won..

Kinda obvious. Haha. But don't worry, Kam. We girls were behind you! (:

After that, it was just chilling out with ice cream (2 TUBS!!!!)
YUMMY! But we had to do it in a kinda unglam place. I won't mention it here. Haha ;)
I think we should go easy on the ice-cream though. Seems like everytime we go out there's always some around. Heh!

HELLO PPL! PHOTOS &VIDS ARE IN MY PHOTOBCKT! ASK ME/HASSA FOR USRNAME &PSWRD.

PS; SORRY THIS IS SO LATE! HEEHEEHEE :D

Celebrate Good Times, Come On!

2006-10-09T02:07:00.000+08:00

Okay. Maybe I've gotten a bit too carried away with the whole end of promos thing. Haha. BUT I LIKE! I don't remember even being this excited and liberated last year please.

Quite a few events have happened already.
1) Outing with part of the 3/4 of the 4 Fs + Lisbeth @ Orchard cum buka
2)Dila's Belated Birthday Celebration @ Simpang cum buka

Firstly, I went to town on Friday to meet Fauzi & Fanny so that we could have dinner at Swensons. So exciting! Earlier that day was the last paper which was H1 Physics for me but we shall not go into that now. I'll just put up pics from that day taken with Fauzi's camera phone. More details go to Fauzi's Blog cos he summed it up quite nicely and I don't wanna drone on with repetitions.

The view outside Swensons@Orchard

Fanny's such a babe!

Part of the reason why repeating J1 wasn't as bad as I thought it would be (:

As you can see, the photos are really dark. The light kept flicking off, God knows why. But it made the ambience a tad more romantic. Oooh-la-la! :p

After that it was just loads of walking around town intending to do some shopping...

Paragon...

I think Fanny looks damn hott here. Haha

I'm bringing Sexy Back. Yeah! Hurhur.

Unfortunately for us, the shops we really wanted to go to were either a) Closed (WHY WERE THEY CLOSED SO EARLY ANYWAYS?) or b)Shut down!

Outside the Stussy shop at Pacific Plaza

We were so disappointed. I think Fanny was more so than I was but she's good at covering it up. Haha. We could only satisfy our urge to shop by pressing our faces up against the windows. Sad sad sad.

It was a great outing though. Ending the day chilling at Coffee Bean. Met Crystal, Gen and Jane there coincidentally. There were quite a few SRJCians out on the town that night celebrating the end of promos, no doubt. Heehee. Only downer was the stupid HAZE!
It's worse than SHEESHA I tell you!
Stay indoors, people! Or plan activities you can enjoy without breathing in the outside air such as movies, bowling, etc.

I wanna update about Dila's bday celebrations at simpang but I refuse to do so without pictures. Haha. SO SEND THEM QUICK, BABES! (:

2006-10-03T00:15:00.000+08:00

Aaahh..
Today, met up with Azie baby to study physics. Got Fiq to come over to the airport to teach us cos we're hopeless bums. Haha. He's good though. Lesson learnt: "common sense".

Math paper was predictable :/
Lit paper was... well, how can you ever tell how you're going to do? Really? When I feel like I sucked, I do not too badly. When I'm okay with it, I end up failing... Eeee! Haha. So I shall just remain stoic about it.

I'm just happy I have only 2 subjects left? 2! Econs and Physics. It seems so close yet so far. I'm dreading results yet can't wait for them to come. Please let me (finally) get my taste of JC2. Hoho.

Why is the net so dead? Why is my phone so dead? I feel lonely even though I just saw some of my friends. This is sooo weird. I call it the promo blues. By the end of these dreaded times, I'm so gonna go out with everybody and anybody. Provided they wanna go out with me :)))))

Aaah! Note to Siti: Where art thou and what is up with you? Are you okay or not? Call me, message me, whatever soooooonnnn!

2006-09-30T16:36:00.000+08:00

YUMM! i am in love with the strawberry cheesecake flavour!

BULLETIN:

I made a fool of myself over the phone with Shan Wee
I won something for the first time and I can't go for it
I have a bunged up nose so i sound like...
"I caddot be a drabatig as i wand do be anybore."
3 DAYS & 4 SUBJECTS LEFT TO GO!

2006-09-29T00:37:00.000+08:00

you sit there in your heartache;
waiting on some beautiful boy to save you from your old ways.

Sorry! Couldn't resist while waitin for my notes to print!
NICE SONG!
The Killers - When You Were Young

Get Lost

2006-09-25T20:56:00.000+08:00

This isn't the 1st time.

I'm disappointed because you always seem to live up to the expectations I have for you.

Just. Be. Silent

LOVE

2006-09-24T18:38:00.000+08:00

Friday evening was a reunion for the four of us; Az, Diki, HL and me. It's been such a long time since we've seen HL cos he's busy with his countless number of dates :p

This will mainly be a photo entry cos I'm hungry and I can't think of what to write! Haha.

We met at Orchard and headed down to Cahaya at Far East for dinner. Then we walked around looking for Diki's stuff and he wanted to head down to Heeren to continue but we died in front of Paragon and started taking loads of pictures;

These are just the tip of the iceberg I tell you!

After that, HL had to leave for his date at Harbourfront and it was just Azie, Diki and Me. Azie desperately wanted to go sheesha so we headed down to Bugis and walked down to Arab Street. On the way there, there was this Suria celebration thingy at Kampung Glam and there were FIREWORKS!!!

Pretty pretty! It was really crowded down there though. Kind of spoils the unique-ness of Arab Street. In Dicky's words, "Kampung Glam is going to be the next Geylang."

Anyway, we went to Ambrosia, again, to sheesha. I'm extremely paranoid about smoking so after this I'm going to wait at least a few months so that my lungs can clear okay, people? Haha.

The ambience was great as usual but there was a damper to all this. What? Well, who else but Mr Moody, overthinking every single thing. So in the end, Azie and I did camwhoring to lighten up our mood. Not his though cos he was a gone case already.
Example:

We were exchanging our facial expressions. As said earlier, this is only a 2 of many. If I were to put all the photos in my camera up here right now you'd be facing 60+ pitchasss! Haha.

I started going crazy towards the end though..

& I guess from the pic, Azie did too! Haha. I even dangled my camera through the window, ominously over the traffic down below to take a pic of myself,

I don't really look crazy but this is an example of not being able to see what lies beneath.

When we finally headed home, Diki finally got what he wanted and only then, did he start being himself. Such an ass la!

Anyways, evaluation of today

NO MORE SHEESHA! For a long time.
MORE 4F LOVE. Must do again kayy?

LOVE!

Lame-Ass Break-Up Excuses!

2006-09-24T18:33:00.000+08:00

This is from Naz's blog. Hilarious! I wonder if I ever do break up with anybody I'll give this lame-ass excuse. Haha.

From top to bottom;

Naz

Azie

Sab

Lina

2006-09-21T19:49:00.000+08:00

I am a goldfish in a bowl. Millions of people pass me by. They stare then knock on the glass. Tong. Tong. Tong. I'm terrified yet I cannot swim away. And so, I adopt a blank expression and blow and play with the bubbles that I make.

Hoho. That was the experience I felt in Macs today. Luckily it wasn't as bad as it all sounds cos I had Hassa with me! It seems like the world decided to ditch us today. Haha.

Oh and my main purpose of being here...

O$$P$$!!!!

You know who you are and how much you owe so hurry pay me so I won't leave blood at your door! Muahahahaha!

Time!

2006-09-19T20:51:00.000+08:00

I have recently become a YouTube addict! Now of all times too. My timing is the best I tell you.

Here's a photo from Fiq's bday PartI. Ya I know it's really late. Haha.

PROMOS ARE IN 10 DAYS!

So what am I doing here?

BYE!

btw, sitz, thanks for sending me home!!! haha.
i should feel so lucky. lucky, lucky, lucky... :)

The Random Melody

2006-09-17T22:47:00.000+08:00

As much as I love my nenek, I cannot get over what she did to my tuk. Sadsad. I don't like cemeteries.

On a lighter note, Prata @ Jalan Kayu is love people! Someone should take us on a midnight drive there for a late late supper. HintHint ;)

School tomorrow. Goodbye friendly faces. I miss you many many to the point that my brain keeps thinking of your timetables :(

As we go on, we remember...

Smoke Machine

2006-09-17T01:16:00.000+08:00

Put your arms around me; what you feel is what you are and what you are is beautiful.

Today was Fiq's Bday celebrations PartII.

We met at Bugis and it was a good thing that the stated time was 5pm cos almost everyone was late except for Sitz of course. Haha.

So when we were ready to go, I handed the bday boy his plan to finally let him on what was going to happen.

And so, all of us headed down to Arab Street

And ate at Kampung Glam Cafe. Typical Malay food but it was nice! Don't worry, Sitz. the bday boy finally got his present, these pair of uber-funkayy shades. We decided to just give it to him after countless attempts to get him to earn the right to get them. Hrmph.

Finally, after eating, it was time to go sheesha! Haha. First time for many. I felt like such an idiot cos I kept sucking but blew out nothing and had images of myself coughing my lungs out but thanks to my coach I was a 'pro' by the end of it all. Haha. Sheesha-ing is okay la. I don't exactly love it and won't get addicted or anything but it's interesting and a great social activity (albeit, unhealthy) Hurhur.

Unfortunately, halfway through, the sheesha thing (what do you call it?) fell over and the coal went everywhere including Fiq's new jacket! Omg I was damn scared/shocked/pitiful/panicky about it cos there was a HOLE but he's such a good sport and didn't make a big deal of it (:

Just before we left, the thing fell over again but this time on ME! I was in such shock my brain didn't register anything but luckily Muhsin and the others acted quickly and saved me from being a walking fireball. Haha. Okay, that was a bit melodramatic but i did get a minor injury on my arm. What started out as a small red dot has evolved into a huge blister. Luckily, I'm a strong girl. Haha but most girls are lah. Look at what we have to go through: high heels, waxing, CHILDBIRTH! I guess it's because of this physical resiliance we have that we are emotionally unstable so as to balance everything. Haha. Okay, sorry for the sidetrack.

Anyway, nice evening. New experiences and stuff. Hope you had a great time, Fiq, despite the whole jacket thing! (:

coolio pic, eh?

I Love Birthdays!

2006-09-12T22:08:00.000+08:00

Today is a special someone's birthday.

I didn't manage to see him all day because he only had one paper and therefore, left before I could meet him to study for Chem tomorrow, which totally sucks, you know, studying on your birthday. The worst part was that I had spent last night making this card in the shape of an electric guitar and, if i may say so myself, was quite proud of it so I was excited to pass it to him.

So, when school ended, Dicky, Muhsin, Kam and I headed down to Tampines to meet Azie and Sitz. After dinner, we decided to spontaneously surprise him at his house! So we bought a cake from Polar and Sitz drove us there.

When we reached, we lit the candles on the cake in front of the lift then positioned ourselves outside his door. We were kind of worried because it turned out that his parents were praying (!) but they called him to the door and they didn't look angry. When he saw us outside the gate he was all "What the hell?" and didn't even register unlocking the gate for us. Then, Dicky came out from around the corner with the cake and we sang Happy Birthday to him right on his doorstep and started screaming at him to unlock the gate so he could blow out the candles.

When we set up everything on the coffee table the birthday boy insisted on changing first because he was "selekeh"(is that how you spell it?). I think it means unkempt. Haha. Vain lah, always will be. After lots of cam-whoring and getting our sugar fix, it was time to go to let him carry on studying for his chem paper tomorrow.

I think we provided a good break. I love to see the looks on people's faces when they are genuinely happy. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy (:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, FIQ!

Hassa & Bibs, you were missed.

ps; fiq, if you ever happen to read my blog please send me the photos asap, ya? thanks!

Do you remember, blahblahblahblah, SEPTEMBER!?

2006-09-12T21:45:00.000+08:00

I was bored so I started reading all my previous posts from last year. Last year I updated quite frequently but the thing was, I was extremely melancholic. So therefore, me not updating that often is kind of a good thing, people! (:

I finished this book that Siti lent me a while ago and there's this quote in there that's very amusing and also, the inspiration for Siti's blog name;

"You are not the fat girl. You are voluptuous!" Farren protested. "You are an
angel descended from the heavens, a goddess of plenty walking among the denizens
of a hell where stick figures reign supreme."

That made me feel good for about 10 seconds at the most. Sigh. Why can't my guy friends be gay and say things like this to me? But then again, I'd be living in denial. Haha.

Alas, the Samsoon obsession is dying as this this is the last week. I just love it. Maybe because the character is so not the typical heroine who is gorgeous, hot, smart and has fabulous clothes. It's because she's real, that's why so many people are suckers for the show.

There are certain things the guy does or says that make you swoon. For example,

"You are attractive because you don't know how attractive you are."

Aaaah! I bet it would be more swoon-worthy if you understood Korean and don't need to resort to reading the subtitles :p

Okay, enough of this entry of random quotes.

The Ego Has Landed

2006-09-06T21:57:00.000+08:00

Now, it's time to recount the events of DICKY SOFIAN RAZAK's birthday.

Okay, okay. I know I was all gung-ho about not getting him a bday gift or even aknowledging that 2nd September was his birthday but he's been my friend for a long time and it was afterall his 18th birthday. So, I decided that pettiness was beneath me. Haha. I can imagine so many people saying "I knew it! I should have bet with her on it!" but you didn't, so HAHAHAHA!

Momentum brought the whole thing to light. It all started with deciding on what present to get him and then on to where to celebrate. I suggested my house cos it's free so we could spend more on the present but after the words left my mouth I kind of regretted it. Why? I could just picture all the cleaning and tidying up I'd have to do and all within a day's notice! If you've known me for some time, you will know the state of my house and that it's no easy task getting ready for guests. Heh.

So the whole day was spent cleaning, tidying, cooking, baking and so on. I really love my family for helping out. My dad helped my mum out in the kitchen, my brother got his hands dirty washing and scrubbing. Haha. I couldn't have made the day successful without them.

The next stage was getting the rest of the people there an hour before the birthday boy arrived because instead of making a card I decided to get them to take pictures of themselves using my Selphy printer and write a message for him behind it.

they actually liked slacking in my room. haha

After I got them to do their little project (it's like kindergarten don't you think?) we had to wait for this lovely lady...

to drive the bday boy here.

Then, it was finally time to eat! My mum's the best la. Her cooking is par none in my books (:

my brother made the garlic bread btw (:

So after dinner, while the girls chilled in my room,

and the guys did their thing in the living room,

Kamaliah and Hassa helped me with the Oreo Cheesecake that I baked in the kitchen. It wasn't a bad first attempt but there were a few cracks in the cake so these 2 creative geniuses helped me cover it with cream and oreo crumbs. Here's the process;

And here's the beautiful end result!

Okay, so the cake was all done & the candles were ready,

but where, you might ask is the bday boy? It took a lot for him to get out of my room to blow out the candles I tell you! Just see for yourself!

you might not be able to see him cos he's kinda dark. heh.

SOMEBODY SHY AH! Haha. It's not everyday you see "Mr Macho" carry a teddy bear. Priceless.

On to cutting the cake!

die, cake, die!

It was yummy! (: *pats myself on the back. Haha.

PRESENTS!!
Background information: He hinted rather shamelessly that he wanted these Puma shoes by informing me of the price, description and where to get it.
So, we got him to believe that we got him these Converse shoes by giving him a Converse shoebox. However, there weren't any shoes in there. Instead, there were 2 shirts and cleverly inserted into the folds were the photo dedications.

The touching thing was that he was already so happy to have gotten this despite probably expecting what he had hinted for. He even didn't want to open or read the messages in front of us for fear of losing his macho-ness.

Little did he know what was lying outside the door...

Pretty obvious, don't you think? Think again.

The girls + Fiq had to go home earlier so we saw them to the gate and he offered to send them off. I gave him this LOOK of mine and he started explaining that he was only sending them off, not really leaving. Then I just asked him a simple question, "Are you blind?" and so, the whole shock-isode began...

He kept holding on to that slipper and backed up all the way to my neighbour's door going the whole time, "aeh, aeh, aaeeehhhhh!"

SUCCESS!

I think this is one of the best birthdays that all of us have ever celebrated together. I was so so so so happy because Dicky was happy and that was the main purpose. I don't think even my own birthday could make me happier. Haha.

Thank you to all who were part of this.

I LOVE YOU MANY MANY! (:

Teacher's Day

2006-08-30T21:03:00.000+08:00

Okay okay. I'm updating already. I am going to cheat and put up different dates even though i'm writing all entries on the same day. Hehe.

Firstly, Teacher's Day Celebrations.

I had to wake up at an unGodly hour to get to school by 0630 not to mention, doing my hair and putting on foundation at home first.
So then it was all preparing and putting on make-up and at around 0800 we went down to the squash court to wait around till it was our turn. We got bored so some of us went to one of the backstage doors in time to hear Emmanuel sing Wonderwall so we sang along while stretching.
Time seemed to fly by after that and before we knew it, we had to get prepared backstage.
The dance itself was okay. I have to admit that we really improved considering we started learning it kinda late but I could still feel that we weren't that sychronised. I STILL LOVE THESE BUNCH OF DANCERS THOUGH (:
While we were dancing I tried my best to exude sexiness, because that's what our choreographer wanted, but there was just ONE thing that was stuck in my mind. These two words kept flashing in my mind's eye in bright, neon lights. MY ASS! MY ASS! I was like, please do not let the audience notice MY ASS. It's all thanks to the jazz pants which are very form fitting. They make me so insecure I tell you.
Another thing I was trying to do was look out for my dear friends, which is not easy when you're dancing and counting and everything on stage. But guess what? THEY WEREN'T THERE! I found them once I'd finished dancing and they were like, "We saw you're last pose though *BIG SMILE*" and I cannot deny that I was disappointed but still, they were there at least (: We watched the rest of the performances from the upper level and I have to say that the crowd was very disappointing. There were so little of them and they were so dead. Really the opposite from last year's.
After that, we explored the carnival and it was okay, I guess. I wanted to go to the haunted house but I was scared to and knew that if I did I would start screaming and do other things subconsciously that may just as well ruin my image forevermore. Haha.

After that it was finally time for me to...

FINALLY EXPERIENCE SITI'S DRIVING!

I'm so proud of you, Sitz. Haha. She was still unsure of things but managed everything just fine. We travelled to Simei for lunch at Sakura and then down to Bedok Reservoir where she actually gave in to letting the guys test-drive. Seeing how excited they were, Kam and I wanted to test-drive too. I'm still amazed that she trusts us so much. (:

After parting with these bunch of people, I went down to Bugis to meet these pretty ladies...

Went around waiting for Sab to slowly(but surely) choose the perfect denim skirt for herself but Azie and I went down to Tong Seng to eat halfway through. After that it was just all chilling at Starbucks. I really do love you girls, you know <3 I'M GOING TO VISIT YOU THIS FRIDAY, NAZ BAYBEHH. I haven't forsaken you (:

Things Are Finally Starting To Look Up

2006-08-28T21:26:00.000+08:00

HELLO!
Okay. I am the worst blog updater in Singapore but I'm so busy and I keep wondering how to put certain events into words. However, my creative genius decided to make that rare appearance and use this slide.com thing i found to illustrate the event to you dear readers.

So, last Saturday, it was Azie's birthday! I was so happy to have been invited to celebrate at East Coast with everyone, although a bit nervous too since it's been so long. This is progress. Finally.
I'll also be meeting the girls again on Thursday so I'm looking forward to that (:

It's said that a picture speaks a thousand words and I have 9. You go do the math. Since I don't have my own photos, I 'stole' from Naz' and Sab's blogs. Heh. Don't mind ya babes?

Here they are! Tadaa!

Is it nice? Is it nice? I think the people who created this thing are geniuses I tell you!

Hmmm.. What else has happened?
Oh ya. Dicky has decided to finally realise I exist again. Yay, I guess. Haha. Anyway, don't take what I said too personally, dude. You know all that not messing with a woman scorned? Well, you did and some things came out that were a bit exaggerated. Sorry about that but you have to know you were in the wrong. Anyway, I'm happy for you and her okay? Really really (:
DON'T MESS IT UP! :D

Also, SITI HAS PASSED HER DRIVING! Licensed now! Woohoo! I'm gonna get free rides, right Sitz? ;)

Last significant thing is Sitz and I have been hanging out a lot with Hassa recently (HELLO!) mainly talking and talking. It's amazing how many new things you learn despite knowing each other for more than a year. Btw, HASSA I WANT OUR CAMWHORE PHOTOS! I wanna do another slide.com thing. Haha. It's been so long since I've taken a photo for the mere sake of taking photos. Good fun.

I can't think of anything else so I hope that this will suffice. *LOOKS POINTEDLY AT CERTAIN PEOPLE.
Teacher's Day is 3 days away. The sooner it's over, the better. I shall be done with dance and can finally focus on the PROMOS! Aaaaaah!

Toodles!

You Don't Know How Lovely You Are

2006-08-14T21:41:00.000+08:00

New skin! New skin!
It's a bit too purple for me though but I just needed change. I'm never satisfied for too long. My mum says that it could be my downfall. I'll never find a husband like this. Hurhur.

Anyways, I finally uploaded photos from my aunt's engagement to national day! I took pictures of the fireworks but they all turned out crappy and too be fair, I think it's an art in itself to get a nice shot of them okay? My mediocre camera skills are not entirely to blame.

Here they are!!
So my auntie got engaged. Honestly, I don't think anyone in the family would've thought it would ever happen. I am NOT being cruel! It's just that... it's just because la. I was the 'official' photographer, the reason only being that I had a camera. Haha. Pathetic. As a result, I wasn't captured much so this is the only photo I got witht the bride-to-be or anyone else for that matter.

The only thing going for me was that it was a good hair day! Thank goodness.

After taking pictures for everybody, and of everybody, there was nothing much else for me to do. Since I was but only a lowly photographer I was left to...

CLEAN CUTLERY! :(
It was a waste to wear my nice kebaya. Sniffsniff. I should have just worn rags.

Heehee. But it was all right. I didn't really mind. I thought it was quite funny, the irony of it all.

The other photo I have was taken on the 9th of August! Yup, National Day. We didn't go to the stadium or any other place participating in the festivities of the occasion but we went all patriotic just going to normal shopping centres. I thought I'd take a photo of us just before we reached home cos we looked so cute(hurhur) but please excuse my lame pose because I ran from the camera to make it for the picture in time (self-timer, you see). So here we are!

Yayyy! Singapore Singapore! Actually I was surprised that even my brother didn't mind dressing up in our nation's colours because he might be too ashamed to be seen with us, which wouldn't be too surprising, but he was sporting that day. It's so long since we've had a family picture. It's just a bummer that I look so lame in it :p

Toodles!

Ready? OKAY!

2006-08-10T13:57:00.000+08:00

Yay! I'm in the middle of my long weekend. It's been quite eventful so far and i'm relatively happy.

Monday met up with Sitz and the guys and Azie was there too surprising all of us. Haha. In a good way though (:
Anyway, talked and talked and then Dicky had to come and totally spoil the mood. Or maybe just mine. I'm not angry at the whole relationship thing I'm just pissed off with him so please don't misunderstand. And as usual, it will take ages or maybe he will never ever realise why, being the totally self-absorbed person he is.

Tuesday was National Day Celebrations and SRJC invaded East Coast Park. There was the run(which seems kind of pointless) and the main event, building the longest sandcastle. It was quite fun actually. But I'm still sad that my class is so not united as compared to the other classes. I was supposed to be interviewed but just before I was supposed to go on, I found out I was supposed to speak MALAY! Hellooooo? So not happening. So I quickly got one of the J2 Malay girls nearby to do the interview instead. Haha.

K. Anyway, after that it was time to go home and get ready for a movie&fireworks! We went to watch Click! at Bugis. Okay, I'm not going to spoil it for ya'll but I really didn't expect it to be a make-you-cry-pools kind of movie. Really makes you appreciate those you love. Sniffsniff.

"WILL YOU STILL LOVE ME IN THE MORNING?"
"FOREVER AND EVER, BABE."
Awwww..

After that, we walked down to marina to watch the fireworks. It was so beautiful. I felt like a little kid again. When I was younger, I used to call 'em lampu wawa's. Hurhur. Random childhood memories. It was freaking crowded down there but we were lucky to get a good view sitting in this small field next to makansutra. Somehow, after the whole thing, we were all really drained so nothing too evenful happened late at night.

I love National Day for giving me a nice, enjoyable holiday. Much appreciated when school spends the majority of the year sucking the life out of you. Heh. Talk about melodramatic.

Happy Holidays!

SO SICK!

2006-08-03T22:04:00.000+08:00

HALO!

It's been ages since I last updated. I guess it's because nothing much has happened. Or rather, too much did.

Well, school-wise...
I passed my mid-years! You don't know how good it feels because I failed horribly for last year's mid-years and promos, ending up in the bottom 100. Even though I'm happy, I know I can do so much better and am currently working towards getting ~~good~~ great grades. It's still kinda not good enough and i still have something to prove to certain people.

For dance...
We're doing lyrical jazz now. Good bye Hip-Hop. I cherished the time we had together but it's time for something new and challenging. So far, we've tried Rihanna's Unfaithful and James Blunt's Tears&Rain. Beautiful but I have no confidence. I'm not exactly that flexible. But my instructor said I do exude feeling and emotion so that's a perk. Haha.
I just hope that the school will accept what we'll perform for Teacher's Day since it's not the usual hip-hop thing. I feel kind of protective of this dance team cos they're such a nice bunch and I don't think I'll be able to take it if they feel unworthy in any way.
Ugh, don't you just hate how judgmental the world can be?

Personal...
I try to think I'm okay but I don't think I can be completely happy. Maybe it's the hormones. Maybe it's just me. I sometimes tend to let my sadness show without meaning to and that's how I know. Because people tell me. But... Things are starting to look up. The bridge is starting to be rebuild between old friendships and it really warms me but makes me sad that it took so long for me to do so. I'm happy all the same though that it's actually happening. Although not so old friendships are starting to fade away, it seems like it's a way of life. Give and take. One cannot exist while the other survives. It's incredibly cynical but it's just the way it looks like to me.

Apart from that, nothing else. I'm just thankful that school is good. There's so much drama happening, especially in the arts faculty that it's hard to keep away for fear of missing the latest. Haha.

Things to look forward to are (drumroll) NEXT WEEK!
There's only school on ONE DAY! Monday.
Tuesday's the beach run//sands of mission
Wednesday's the actual national day. hari kebangsaan singapura! -not bad eh? heehee
Thursday's a public holiday!
Friday is i-learn day! I might have dance though but who cares? the point is it's not real school.

So yup. that's the latest people.
Tata!
Love&Peace (:

Green Fields

2006-07-11T01:19:00.000+08:00

It's a shame, Zidane. A crying shame.

Oh well, Italy won the World Cup. Congrats to all Italia fans. I didn't go to school today due to either mourning or lack of sleep. Hehe. Shhh! Don't tell my CT cos I'm planning on telling her I had cramps. I'm kinda apprehensive though cos I don't have an MC. I'm actually surprised my mum let my bro and I watch the finals and handled the possiblity of us not going to school quite well. Heh. But she warned that we better not be absent anymore after this unless we're either chronically ill or dead. So ya. Odds are we won't be skipping school any time soon.

I just wonder why Zidane did it. He seemed perfectly normal, exchanging words with Mazeratti as they were walking down(or up) the field and suddenly he turns around and head butts Mazeratti in the chest! Woah. Considering it's his last World Cup, whatever Mazeratti said to him must have been a serious insult or something. Probably racial. Ironic actually since the World Cup makes the players take anti-racism oaths and all.

Well, this WC was definately entertaining but now it's back to our boring little lives. Or maybe not, depending on who you are (;

Anyway, speaking of football, this is a small memory of England where we passed by Old Trafford and there was a friendly between Jamaica and England. Very nicely done by FAIZAL! Aka Mr Invisible. Hehe. Not so invisible anymore. But thanks loads dude (:

I want to compile all my photos in groups like this so once it's done I shall post the hundreds (or a fraction of 'em) right here. So yes, look out for this upcoming attraction.

Sometimes I don't know why I write as if I'm addressing readers when probably, no one even bothers but there's that feeling where you actually want people to read about what's going on in your life (&head) even though there are times you also wish that nobody knows what's happening but you. Well, I can be sure of one thing though. When I was out having dinner at Bugis on Sunday with Sitz and Fiq and talking about this little issue of mine, Siti assured me that she reads my blog. So now I should probably stop generalising and write as if I'm addressing her only. Haha.
HI SITZ! (:

K. Kidding. Anyway, this Hutch guy isn't too bad la. But I'm still missing Shan.

Another dose of randomosity;
Jonathan Rhys Meyers is so gorgeous! It's just such a spoiler he runs like a sissy.

When I was thinking of his name my mind suddenly sprung up the image of Gimli from LOTR. Cos of the Rhys in his name too! But his is John Rhys-Davies. They have the John/Jon and Rhys thing in common so I guess they're both Irish.

They couldn't be more different

:D

Ta!

Blood's Thicker Than Water

2006-07-09T13:11:00.000+08:00

I'm so happy I have such a great family cos at the end of the day, they're the only ones you have left. (:

Anyway, I realise I like to use a lot of "and all"'s so I shall try to kick the habit for my own sake and whoever bothers to read.

Today, I had to go to school at 10 to have listening comprehension with Cikgu. My parents dropped me off and offered to pick me up afterwards so that I could go off and do whatever they wanted to do later. I told them don't need but my mum insisted cos I think she knew that I had nothing else to do but mope around alone at home.

So after they fetched me we headed down to Clementi for Dad's work stuff. I was kinda tired cos I hate going to school on Saturdays (thanks a lot Cikgu) so I wanted to sleep on the way. But before that I had a croissant and orange juice my mum bought for my breakfast. Délicieux!

When my dad had finished everything he had wanted to do there and my mum and I had finished exploring this foreign place, I persuaded them to take me to Plaza Singapura cos I couldn't think of anywhere better. On the way there, we passed by Cineleisure and my mum spotted the LIME flea market @ *scape. So we decided to stop there instead. They have a lot of cool things there but I think that some of the stuff are kinda overpriced. The stuff at the Tanglin Mall flea market are much cheaper even. Could be because of the 20$ rental? Nevertheless, it didn't stop me from buying this beautiful purple belt:

After that, we headed down to Cineleisure to have lunch and we passed by this MTV thing outside. Saw Denise Keller modelling for some photos and talking into a video camera before the thing started. It's something to do with breakdancers, emcees and the bicycle stunt-ers. Anyway, she is freaking skinny, it's scary. Especially since her head is so big(literally). So we went in to have lunch and we had steak. Mmmm.. more delicious food (: We only managed to walk around for a while because the time on the parking coupons was going to be up soon but before I left I bought another belt. Haha. I was on a belt frenzy:

When we exited Cineleisure the performances had started already and they were damn good. Especially the breakers. How I wish I could do such things with my body. Haha. Anyway, while we were watching, this Sony booth was situated in front of the performing area and they were selling these really cute flashdisks. They were going for quite cheap too plus, you'd get a whole s**tload of freebies if you bought one. My mum bought one so that I could have the flashdisk and she could have all the freebies. Haha. Mums will be mums. The flashdisk is really damn small, as you can see:

So after all that, we went home. I thought I wanted to ajak people to go to Plaza Sing with me at midnight. They're screening Bend It Like Beckham at 12mn and after that they're going to screen the 3rd/4th Placing for the World Cup. Tix are only 2$ and if you add 4$ you get free-flow coke and popcorn! Sounds damn fun! Unfortch, Fiq had his cousin's wedding and Sitz father wouldn't let her go even though she wanted to. But it's okay lah. ~~I'm not one of those who gets bitchy over these kind of things, you know?~~ Fiq said that maybe the next World Cup when we're older and when somebody might have a car. Haha. I can't wait (:

That's all for now.

TELLYTELLYTELLY!

2006-07-08T18:40:00.000+08:00

RECENT HAPPENINGS;

Firstly, SINGAPORE IDOL FEVER HAS RETURNED!
I think that everything is bigger and better now. I love the new line-up. They're more fun, talented and definately more charismatic than the previous batch. My mum and I are the resident fanatics but my brother's slowly joining in. My mum even went out to buy the SI mag right after it was released. She is so cute over all this. Weird, being that she's my mother and all but I still find her cute. Here's my take, cos i'm bored and have nothing better to do.

Girls Who Do Not Leave Much Impression On Me:
Jasmine & Emilee
However, Jasmine might be one of those who progressively gains more star-quality and confidence as shows go by and all that cos she's labelled the 'resident hottie' which i find kinda surprising.

Guys Who Do Not Leave Much Impression On Me:
Jay, Joakim & Hady
Okay. Jay's voice is not so bad but his crying is kind of a turn off (even though he made me tear for him) and all and he doesn't have the kind of persona that shouts out at you to vote for him. Joakim is so cute and a very sweet boy but his voice needs serious tuning. Hady is one of those, along with Joakim who I haven't really heard sing cos I was in England and all. I guess that's why he doesn't really rub off me and all. But my grandma recognises him cos apparently, he's one of her old neighbour's sons/son. I wonder if I ever saw him when I was at my grandma's house all those years ago when I was young and cute. Haha.

Who I Don't Really Like:
Gayle
Don't ask me why. I just don't. Please don't send in the hate mail.

Who's Okay:
Mathilda & Norman
She has great vocals. Really! But she's kinda boring :/ Norman is also really nice and all. Friendly and likeable plus his voice is fine but there's something that's missing.

Girls I Like:
Rahimah & Nurul
Rahimah brings something new to the comp for the girls. She's definately unique and her voice is rocker-ish but she's cool. I guess we kind of have a soft spot for her too cos my mum's name is Rahimah too! Haha. So old school la. I find Nurul really cute and sweet and funny in her own lame way. Turns out she was the one who came up with the World's Smallest Hug (a pinch!).

Guys I Like:
Paul & Jonathan
I know that loads of people think that Paul's a poser and all but he can sing plus exude feeling into it. Plus, the thing that really makes him endearing is that he has this great big personality that makes you laugh and you can't help but pay attention and be entertained by him. Jonathan on the other hand is like the total package. He is smart, he can sing, he looks good and he's humble about it all. Plus, he must have a good physique being in the commandos and all. Woosh!

Okay. So that's my 2cents worth on the whole idol saga. On to other things.

C.I.D. has finally finished and it's now time to get ready for Love at 0°Celcius. I can't tell you how happy I am that it's all over. C.I.D. was freaking irritating. Firstly, almost everybody dies or goes to prison and secondly, I cannot get over the whole thing of Jiayi killing her father when she found out he killed her real mother. I have like really strong views over it all cos it's just wrong. Maybe I'm just especially irritated cos Jeanette Aw is the actress and I've never been able to stand her since Holland V. Anyway, I know it was wrong to murder somebody but think about it. He was the one who raised you, cared for you and loved you like his own for more than half of your life. And in a second, you can turn on him and say that "He's not my real father!" and "You've made me what I am" (not in a good way) when she's a FREAKIN' FORENSICS EXPERT! It's totally understandable to be angry but to turn on your father like that is ass headed. It brings up the issue of an adopted kid. If he ever finds his real parents would he suddenly stop loving his adopted family and run off to his so called 'real' one? It just shows what kind of a person you are.

Off such morbid stuff and let's go on to fashion!
I cannot get enough of Project Runway! I love Danial's stuff and all. He's really talented and has that special creative eye when it comes to his work. Chloe's designs are also really nice and I hope that both of them go far in the competition.

All of this proves one thing;
At the rate I'm going, I'm going to be a seriously chronic telly addict! Aaaaaahhh!

End of Me

2006-06-29T00:15:00.000+08:00

exams are fished.
fishduckfishduckfishduckfishduck. you get the idea.

i am so going to flunk. what am i going to do? nothing. there's nothing TO do.

okay. now i've REALLY gotten my wake-up call(part II), louder and more urgent. after these freaking midyears i'm going to mug as best as i can.

england was lovely and all but no more holidays. hear that mum? DON'T DRAG ME OFF ANYWHERE! even to malaysia/indonesia/etc. well, maybe i'll give in to JB. hehehe. you know, day trips.

tomorrow is physics H1 paper. i don't know how i'm going to do it. i missed the dynamics lecture due to the england trip(yet again!). i guess the best i can do is try to rely on last year's notes? HA! a lot of good that did me last time.

shit la. i'm on the verge of hysteria. why? because math sucked. today econs, my supposed ROCK, was screwed. malay doesn't even need elaboration. & now i only have lit and phys left. great. just fishin great.

today nelly furtado's promiscuous girl kept playing over and over again in my mind during econs. just because it was the first thing i heard when i woke up in the morning. is it any wonder?

AND WHERE THE HELL IS SHAN! I DON'T LIKE THIS GUY!
why did you have to go and leave me like that ):

argh. i've gone crazy. i need something. anything. but WHAT?

/another thing running through my head;
so, douse yourself in cheap perfume
it's so fitting, so fitting of the way you are
can't cover it up
CAN'T COVER IT UP!

heeheehee.
(yup, i've officially gone mad)

Back to Reality

2006-06-27T01:33:00.000+08:00

heya! i'm finally back from england! will upload pics soon when my com isn't being such a bitch as usual. if you missed me, i missed you too! if you didn't even realise i was gone, screw you, but i still missed you (:

anyhoo. although i was spending 2 weeks in a great place with great people, it's back to the singapore life now. i am now in the middle of the mid-years and have hardly studied due to said 'lit enrichment trip' [i say HOLIDAY!]. how now? kok is so going to get me. maths tomorrow. i mean today. you see? i'm up on a day that i'm going to have dear old MATHEMATICS. i'm terrible. but i guess the plus side is that it's an afternoon paper? haha. shall wake up at 6/7? if i can of course.

i love you shan wee for never failing to keep me company at times when i cannot fall asleep. muah!

ugh. don't you just hate exams? apart from the reasons that are obvious. i miss people i haven't seen for close to a month! maybe even longer for those who aren't in SR. thankfully there are random calls to people who keep you company when you're really feeling the bite of lonliness cos everone else is muggin their lives away. lovely :)

been studying with siti even though she doesn't have any exams anymore since she's in poly now. u lucky toot! but still, company much appreciated babes. today was slightly more people than the norm. apart from sitz, fiq and me, there was hassa and arina. so see. at least i attempted to study even though it's so last minute. i wonder if the principal will be a bit more lax with the lit trip people? there is no way i can excel now even though i so wanted to. not possible. really.

anyway, new skin. it's very different from my others. actually i couldn't be bothered muchos cos i just wanted to see something not so ... BROWN. so i went to the skin of the day page and chose july 21st. haha. no special thing about the date. the skin caught my eye. we're always talking about the negative sides of everything so for once i deserve to feel beautiful dammit. hurhur. anyway. i think the adidas high heel is cool. although it looks dreadfully painful.
if only we lived in a world where we could RUN in stilettos
hear! hear!

pics next time honey ;)
ta!

silence engulffs

2006-05-22T21:49:00.000+08:00

sigh. sighsighsigh.
i think i'm cursed. star-crossed maybe. why does this always happen to me? and always in this aspect of life.
all this silence. masked meanings and gestures. is this the way it's supposed to be? ideally it shouldn't be this way. if what we have were true, it shouldn't be this way.
but if it wasn't, would we be brave enough to handle it?

ah, the ironies of life. what we hate and want to change is what we may be afraid of. i write vaguely becuase i am afraid. and i know and feel that it is wrong to be so. yet i cannot stop myself. oh well.. *shrugs.

[cut][because now i do know that you do care (:]

frustrations. running through my veins like white blood cells, rushing to kill off the virus. okay i'm no bio student but it's the only thing that comes to mind about all this rubbish.

-

where did i go wrong? i lost a friend,
somewhere along in the bitterness.
and i would've stayed up with you all night,
had i known how to save a life.
-the fray

I Set My Clocks Early Cos I Know I'm Always Late

2006-05-18T21:53:00.000+08:00

tension. tension. you can cut it with a knife.
if you cannot stand it, then why don't you just put your ego aside and do the right thing?

be a man; do the right thing.

now what ad is that from? all i recall is that it was quite funny. anyway... whatever, dude. you're bringing everything unto yourself.

i'm watching the women of times drama now. how i wish i could go to a spa and relax. i'm breaking out everywhere. but then again, it could be due to slacking too much to. you know, the not so good circulation of blood. ugh.

oh no. i'm in a dilemma. tomorrow at 7 is this of fools & mad men thing for the lit students by the lit students. it's gonna be a formal affair. it sounds so interesting cos it's gonna be kind of controversial, the way they'll interprate some of shakespeare's plays. i wanna see the look on kok's face man! haha. she's gonna be there but thankfully, she won't be there for the post-production thing. PLUS, there's gonna be food and everything's FREE OF CHARGE.

now compare this to the tjc dance thingy they're gonna have at kallang theatre. It's at 8 and it's $12. there's only going to be dancing and some guest appearances by sajc dance team and an nus one i think. and it's with people i hardly even know.

okay. now that i've put things out like this i can see what i really wanna go for. damn it. how? the dance thing? freak. why oh why do they always have to tell me things last minute and i'm left making a difficult decision. so far nobody has informed me about the tickets to the tjc thingy so hopefully it's cancelled for some reason? please god let it be so! i shall add a silent prayer. i do get myself into stupid situations sometimes. really.

okayyyyyy. jewel in the palace has started!!!!

tata!

Where's The Ground?

2006-05-12T15:32:00.000+08:00

Oh you do have a bitter heart, don't you?
Why don't you just drop dead?

It's funny how the bitterness of others makes you bitter too eh? But I shall try to not let it affect me. Try.

Anyway, Happy Vesak Day everyone! Enjoying your holiday? Good. Cos I'm not. Well not really. I am grateful for the sleep-in but other than that I'm rotting at home. The only good thing that I have now is watching Ever After on STARmovies. I love it. Don't think I'll ever get sick of it. Who doesn't love a fairy tale? But a more difficult question would be who has lived a fairy tale? In the real world that we live in today it would be very rare to come across such a person.

Alas, it is finishing now. So what can I do on a rainy late afternoon such as this? Mope around I guess and stuff my fat face with junk food. Hoorah!
What is the point of cable vision when nothing good is on?! This is so frustrating.

Oooh. Movie trailers. I"m so watching The Da Vinci Code. This is one thing I won't forgive myself for missing. Mummy told me to book the tickets now for the fam so that we can watch it with good seats on opening night. Talk about kiasu. Haha. But we are Singaporeans after all.

Okay. Forgive me for this incredibly boring entry. I shall return to the rotting process.

Ta!

The Art of Discretion

2006-05-10T00:05:00.001+08:00

i seriously think my brother has never heard of tmi; too much info. really. wayyyyy too much info man. gross! ugh.

anyway, can i pls gloat and say i finally passed my 2.4! woohoo! 15.4min. even ms riviera was surprised, but pleasantly. i think i've finally got her off my back. no more over 18mins for me. i felt like dying but still, who cares? no more running, no more running! (ok we know that's not entirely true, but still...) i think monday was quite a good day. after that, got back our econs class test results. i topped the class. hurhur. however, nothing lasts forever cos after school we had our econs ct and i was scribbling so furiously that when it was finally over my hand was shaking. i'm not so confident this time but still, i shall enjoy the present before i suffer in the future.

okay. i'm supposed to be writing my king lear essay right now plus do econs drq but i'm so not in the mood. i'm kinda excited abt the england lit trip in june. my first time going out of singapore without my parents! haha. i sound so noobish but who cares? and i can't even imagine what it's like there. the last time i went was in '97 i think and that was like only the second time in my entire life so this is equally new to me as well. i can't remember anything from last time apart from small snippets hidden at the back of my mind. i was checking the temperatures there now and it's cooler than the air-con temp in my room. i think i'm going to freeze to death la. but hopefully i'll freeze happily. haha. which brings me to thinking, WHAT DO I BRING?! i have no idea. oh why can't i be a wise and all-knowing soul?

ladidah. i'm way too hyper for this time of night/morn. yet, i can't bring myself to bring myself to the task at hand. way to go for self-determination. ah. school. today i was kinda alone cos fat, iza, hal didn't come and guess what? (what?) bibs has withdrawn from school. why? cos she's taking a risk. she's not happy here anyway so i guess it makes sense but still... BIBS!! it was all so sudden that i'm still in shock. meet up with us ya? don't let farhan absorb your life. haha. so in the end, i waited 1 and 1/2 hours for diki to finish cos he wanted to go to bugis to buy shoes. i decided to do maths and by the time it was 515 i was so mentally exhausted i felt so lazy to go. i found out the other guys wanna go tomorrow so they can layan him la. i made up for it by treatin him to a bk student's meal where we met up with sitz too. and what did we talk abt? cars. haha. very different.
dreams, they do bring you far. that is if you hold on to them. so hold on.

okay. i seriously gotta get back to work. come on. i can do this.
i shall log off now, i shall log off now, i shall log off now, i shall.......

The Art of Discretion

2006-05-10T00:05:00.000+08:00

Bathing in the Moonlight

2006-05-02T21:49:00.000+08:00

i am such a sucker. be prepared for some emo crap. if you don't like it get lost. aaahh. save me from my emo-ism.

this is not love. it's just intense like. if it were love, i'd be able to look you in the eye, be at ease when i'm around you and just sit in silence with you and not feel awkward. i've got to move on. this is killing me.

anyway. i've decided to take my friends' advice and stick with dance. the thing is i'm scared i'm gonna be so lost and left out(again) tomorrow cos i haven't gone for so long and they're definataly gonna be in the middle of a choreo plus i don't have the time to learn since it starts at 245 and my lessons end at 3. once again let me say i hate my time table. ok. whatever. i'll just do what my dad would tell me to do and just suck it up and do it. what's life without those little times you feel like a complete dumbass right? who knows? some good may come out of it.

wish me luck.

anyway, catchy song of the day: No Tomorrow by Orson

...there's no line for you and me
cos tonight we're vip
i know somebody at the door
i see that twinkle in your eye
you shake that ass and i just die
let's check our coats and move out to the floor...

damn i love this song. it's nice to sing to cos the beat and the lyrics are funky. check it out.

and to end off this post, an update of house happenings.
come on, guess what it is. hint: look at the title.
yup. it is what it is. literally.
the fuse for the lightings in BOTH bathrooms has gone dead. bloody contractors. i mean it is quite romantic and all bathing with only the moonlight shining through the bathroom windows and candles burning, casting dancing shadows against the tiled walls... but it can be bloody painful. i'm sure you can imagine why.

ciao.

shoot! BANG! dead.

2006-04-28T23:37:00.000+08:00

Wednesday was Death & the Maiden. Interesting but I hate hanging endings. Heh. Still, it was good. The sharing session was enlightening too. Lim Yu Beng is hot by the way. Haha. Or at least I think so. I'm weird, so what?

Anyhoo, past happenings this week...
Ermm.. Not much I guess. OOoh. Side track a bit.

I see you, baby
Shakin that ass, shakin that ass, shakin that ass

Hee. I love to listen this song. It's so groovable even though it's kinda lame.
Ok ok back to topic. As I said, nothing much happened. For school I'm not doing too badly. Topped the class for math! Haha. Seriously, who would've seen that coming? Farah and Math don't go together. Physics wasn't too bad either. 64% was way higher than I expected. Hal wants to study Phys together some time. It's like so necessary. Who the hell knows what Mr Cox is talking about? The funny thing is I'm doing okay for the 'science' subjects but my Lit is so disappointing. And that sentence in itself is so wrong. Econs is okay. Love the subject hate the teacher. I don't know why she has to be so bitchy all the time. Down a chill pill, woman!

Ugh, enough about school. It's so mundane. I want to talk about loads of things but only one thing is haunting my thoughts. I think that what Fiq said to me was completely unfounded but hit close to home. Too close. I can honestly say I didn't want what happened to happen. But maybe he's right. I may never keep any of my friends. I can already feel lonliness engulfing me. But I can say that I really have come to love my friends made. So much so that I feel no need to make new ones in J1. I'm fine with everyone just not close. I know it's dumb and that I'm screwing up my social life in school for next year but I just don't have that urgency to make new friends.

I'm going to the garden to eat some wo-o-o-orms...

Fool is Me

2006-04-23T22:05:00.000+08:00

my current msn nick is
only fools wear their hearts on their sleeves - & i'm a fool
i betcha there are tons of people who feel the same way out there. there are the odd few who would protest since they keep everything in, scared to let the world see how vulnerable they are.
funnily, that's me too. there are some things i don't share but then there are the things that i do.
& wad makes things worse is that what i do let shine through is what can potentially be my downfall.

okay. you know that i know that you know i'm typing rubbish. haha. but think about how many times rubbish has proven true ;)

anyhoo. i'm lazy to type properly cos my small finger hurts pressing on the shift button tonight. weird but whatever. i woke up this morning to some racket at the end of my bed. i reluctantly lifted my eyelids a few mm and saw nothing. then i propped myself up by the elbows to see properly. my maind line of thinking was, there better not be a huge rat there. and then...

harris started rising slowly in this weird facial contortion and started climbing the ladder slowly (which i only just realised was there) towards my bedroom fan repeating the lines,
"Siti clean fan, Siti clean fan."
HAHAHAHAHA. imagine waking up to that. so ya. the day started off quite well. unfortunately i let my head hit the pillow again and slept for another hour or so. i swear that sleep is and always will be my downfall.

yesterday, because of sleep i didn't wake up early enough to go watch MIQ. heh. actually iza and i did wake up on time but we kept falling asleep and waking up and falling asleep multiple times and kept track of each other's progress my sleepy sms'.

but it wasn't so bad cos if we had gone for miq we would have missed the syf central judging of display bands. tk got gold with honours btw. i'm so happy for them but (i know this is bad of me) i didn't think they left a great impression and are far off from past standards. but still, yay tk band!

nothing much after that. hanged out with the usual suspects as usual :)
i really needta study. even though mid yrs are in july. that's freakin long. i'm like dying for them to come soon. the sooner they come, the sooner i can prove myself.

-FIN-

to dance or not to dance?

Rose-Smelling Wet Tissues

2006-04-13T20:45:00.000+08:00

Well, today isn't such a good day to say the least.

Got our PW results you see. It's not that I mind not getting a not so great grade. I just feel so disappointed and shitty cos I'm the only one in my group who got that grade. I mean I worked equally hard if not more with all those sleepless nights. It's just so unfair. So I went to the PE toilet and wanted to break down there and then but Riviera caught me and sent me into the hall for some talk regarding my weight. (Yup, I'm fat.) & then I made friends with this guy self-named Fookie. So nice la he.

"Are you supposed to be here?"
"Er.. Ya."(looks down at self)
"You don't look like it leh."
"HAHAHAHA."

Well at least he made me feel better for just a little while. Then Bibs came in and asked the 3 tragic words, "Are you okay?" and i just started tearing and Fookie was kinda shocked but was chatting to me nicely. So then after that I finally made it to the toilet and sniffed and blubbered and cried, etc.

But I'm just happy that my friends are such sweet lovely things. They were there for me and tried to make me feel better. They're concern and comfort touched me so much that it added on to the tear-flow. Thanks all! (: & Iza, even though you weren't there you're message was just so sweet and touching I couldn't help the tears from falling either. Thanks a lot babe (:

Imran is classic.
"Are you all okay?" looks at me, "Is she okay?"
I not pathetically.
"Do you need tissue? I have loads of tissue. Wet and dry also have"
"It's okay. I have some."
"It's okay. Just take my tissue. My wet tissue is rose-smelling. Very nice! Just take them all."
Hands me all the tissue.
"I was just in the library with you. Remember to channel all the frustration into your a levels k? Cheer up!"
I nod pathetically again with my teary face but this time, with a smile.

Hee. Such a faggot la but a very NICE faggot. (:

Anyway, I'm going to Bintan tomorrow. I'll try my best to have fun and all that and try not to think of bloody PW. Set aside some time to work on getting my 'hot bod' to lasso the guy of my dreams. Hurhur. Thanks to Fiq la. Haha.

----
IZA FIXED MY LAYOUT! WEEEE! YOU ROCK BABE! (:

Hugs &Kisses

2006-04-12T14:05:00.000+08:00

Love you sexy chick. (:

Lotsa HUGgieS pampers &hershey KISSES,
Sickly-love zorro

Down With The Fat Girl

2006-02-02T22:44:00.000+08:00

I'm online cos I'm supposed to be doing research on corruption for GP. Man this is tough. Therefore I'm distracted. Tsk. Anyway, I've also not done my maths yet cos it's FUNCTIONS(!) and there're a ton of questions and this is how i'm screwed. My first FOUR periods tomorrow are math. 2 hours! Ugh.

Let me drone on about today. Today is the longest day in my school time table yet we finish at 4. Compared to last year, this is heaven =) Haha.

Had math lecture with Mr Anwar I think and I did that thing where I slept with my eyes open again. Freak it's scary. I only 'woke up' when Sarina beat me on the arm and my first reaction was to ask her "Did you hit my arm cos I didn't feel it.." LAME LAME LAME I tell you. But I stopped myself just in time before she realises what a psychopath she has for a classmate.

Then for lit, we watched the Shakespeare in 40 minutes thing. Wee! So funny. I watched the thing in Singapore at the Home of SRT in sec something. I remember I laughed until I almost peed in my pants. I think everybody should go and watch it regardless of whether you are interested in Shakespeare but just plainly appreciate good humour :D I love lit classes/lectures. The only downside is sitting on the floor in the music room so my legs never fail to cramp up.

Lastly, MALAY. My favourite class. Today was great man.
What kind of imbuhan do I have the most problems with? Semua, Cikgu. *She gives a pitiful look.
How much did you get for the worksheet? Dua (Upon 25. 1 point for 'yang' in prosedur cloze which I just stuck down there and 1 for one of the peribahasas)
I so rock la. But cikgu doesn't seem to care. She's like accepted the fact that she has a complete moron in her class. And so do my classmates I guess. Haha. At least I can laugh freely with them cos they know how much of an idiot I am. But why oh why won't they let me Malay B? Free me from this Hell!

Okok. Back to GP for me. What's the big deal about corruption anyway?

I've Loved You All Along

2006-02-01T20:49:00.000+08:00

OOoohh! I lurve the song Far Away by Nickelback. But I've only just seen the video today and it makes me want to cry even more. It's so emo. So lovely. Sigh.. I shall put up the lyrics so you can get an idea if you haven't heard it already and then you should go look for the video yourself and WATCH IT NOW!

"Far Away" - Nickelback

This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

[CHORUS]
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

[CHORUS]

So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go

Ah, bliss. I love it when there's a rare occurence of a song where the tune is nice and the lyrics are touching. The video is a nice compliment too.

Anyway, MY BLOG! WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO MY BEAUTIFUL TEMPLATE?
**IZA COME SAVE ME QUICK! I'LL MSG YOU MY USER ID + PSWRD WHEN UR FREE.

I finally came home before 8 today! Weee! Today Justice/Justis[?] said I have the groove (: but I don't have the power ): How does one dance powerfully? I was sweating like crazy but still there didn't seem to be any difference. Oh well. I shall try harder I guess. 3 times a week is gonna be killer. Danceworks on the 25th/26th. Good luck to us. Hoho.

Although it's not like me to get involved in any of this, then or now, it hurts to know that the whole world knew before I did and I had to find out from everbody else what was happening instead of knowing directly from the source.

I have so much more to get off my chest but it's better if I don't. But it's okay la. Cos apparently, when the cows come home I'm only gonna be left with my SR peeps and frankly, that's more than I could ask for.

Return Of The Queen

2006-01-31T22:44:00.000+08:00

It's been AGES since I last updated! Woah. 14 December.

Well loads of things have happened. Good, Bad & Ugly.

Point form perhaps?
-Retaindom is hellish. Really. Nobody said it'd be this hard. But then again, nothing is easy. I'm taking Math Econs & Lit this time around and History as my H1 fyi.
-Diki has surprised us all by treating us Swensens. Like finally lah :p Hoho.
-Freshmen are a kinda boring bunch except for maybe the Lit kids.
-CNY is over. Dance was kind of a disappointment. Love the dancing, hate the company. Wish I had joined the dikir girls instead. You people rocked the whole show btw =)
-Danceworks is coming ever nearer. We are so not prepared. Wooohoooo -_-
-Some online sh*t on-going
-Body is getting out of control
-Sudden nostalgia for Bollywood films

Can't think of anything else. When I do I shall update.
I have to get back to studying but it's beyond me on what I should study cos we've barely even started the syllabus. Ah whatever...

Welcome back to my life.

2005-12-14T16:00:00.000+08:00

New template; <3 align="left">

It's been around a month since my last enry so it's about time I updated. I need to start thinkin happy thoughts. I'm becoming quite the cynic. Anyway, some nice things that have happened since the last time I blogged. Let me try this in chronological order.

1) PHR

Turned out quite fine. More people turned up than we expected. It was actually okay la but Cikgu Pitrah didn't seem to think that way so it kinda dampened the mood a little.

SRdarlings

Dicky wearing Sitz's heels. So so gay :D

After that we went to Hilmi's house to Jalan Raya a little since we were already wearing our raya clothes. I had to leave early to go watch a Twist of Fate with family and the rest went off without me. Oh well, you can't have too much of a good thing.

The show was quite good. I loved the twist. It had a bit of everything; singing, dancing, romance, comedy, drama and mystery. Ooooh.

2) ESCAPE

My first time going there since sec1. I met the rest late with Fatin. Heh. Nothing much has changed but they have the haunted house and it was SPOOKY! Throughout the whole time we were walking(running, rather) through, we were screaming ourselves hoarse. Except the guys of course. They hardly blinked. I found someone who's even more scared than I am of the rides and she is Fatin. It kinda relaxes you when you're with someone who's more scared than you are. Haha. Oh and I almost died in a freak go-cart thing. But I'm still alive so I'll spare the details. Hoho.

3) MOOOVIES

Sabbie Darling is such a great movie karkee. Thanks babe for dating me. We watched 2 great movies;

Just Like Heaven

Pride & Prejudice

I loved both. Really. Unfotunately both times, we were stuck with idiots for an audience. Boo to them. But still they were really good. Even for Pride & Prejudice which I was a bit sceptical about because I have the BBC version which is around 4 hours or more with COLIN FIRTH(!). But, it proved me wrong and was quite a good version considering that it was half the time of the BBC one. Which means that the Straits Times movie critics were WRONG. It is not too modernised.

Okay. I can't think of what else to write. Just a few random things like; I'm inspired to start gourmet Italian cooking. To start making my own clothes (winks to Sab). To become a make-up artist. To design my own template. To get rid of this stupid eczema. (I swear it's getting worse. How many more doctors do I have to go to see? Any recommendations?) And I shall do all in my own time.

TTFN (:

Hatred

2005-11-17T01:49:00.000+08:00

I hate school. I hate dance. I hate everything. Roar to everything associated with SR apart from darling friends.

Yesterday had to hand in the damned GPF. I woke up late for one thing and thought I'd just ask somebody to forge my signature but in the end my group member persuaded me to come so I got ready and left the house looking like a mad woman and stood by the side of the road to get a freakin cab. It seriously didn't help that no cab was in sight/all cabs were busy/those that were free just zoomed past me PLUS William from TK crossed the road at that instant so I pretended I was busy focusing all my concentration on the traffic but the unavoidable smile and wave came and I could have just slapped my forehead there and then. Basket! Me looking like that.

Anyway in school Gan took up so much unnecessary time doing the stupid thing that I felt like just walking out the door but I couldn't do that to my group. AND THEN... Francesca wrongly paginated everything so I had to redo the first copy and I could have just broken-down. And then I got a message about a last minute dance practices and I seriously just lost it. Went to the toilet for a while to relax and calm down.

I think that was a really bad day. And I also think that I was a bit cranky which was why I was so emotional. I walked around the whole day looking as if my rabbits had just died which lead to people keep on asking me the classic questions "What's wrong?" and "Are you okay?" so I just grinned to make them feel better. I know, what's the point right?

So get this, tomorrow(today, rather) I have dance for four(4) hours. Yes, It's true :( Four freakin hours. Tell me why the freak do we need to have so many hours of practice for just one stupid show on the 5th of December which is not even a real show cos it's just a performance for the the JC2s on their graduation night. Does it matter? Seriously? Does it freaking matter? We're not even gonna be that good. Yes, I'm cynical but seriously. DO THEY HONESTLY THINK THEY'RE GONNA ROCK THE WHOLE PARTY? People won't give a damn. I mean it's their night, they'll forget about us by the end of the night. God!

Sigh. I don't know why it's so different now. I love dancing. In TK when we had performances I was willing and enthusiastic about going for rehearsals and stuff no matter how long we had to take. It's just the team. I don't get the team. I guess I'm not really one of them. I mean firstly, there's the language barrier cos of their frequent bantering in Mandarin. I don't mind but I think it's pretty obvious I don't understand what they're talking about but do they care? Nope. And they're just so different I guess. The screaming and the hugging and the kissing and the cute-ness is just SO not me. It's hard to fit in. Maybe cos it's cos I'm the "biggest girl in dance." Blah. If only I wasn't so insecure then I wouldn't care. I feel like just quitting but then I'd be giving up something that I love again and I don't wanna go through that whole stage of regret again.

This is depressing. I'm gonna sleep it off.

**I'm so sorry Sabbie :(

Candles Extinguished, Wishes Fulfilled

2005-11-13T23:41:00.000+08:00

So another 19 minutes...

Okay the deed is done. It's now 12.24am and November the 14th. My family has completely forgotten it's my birthday. I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Usually at this time or earlier they'd come bursting into my room. Oh well. I kinda prepared myself for this. I also prepared myself for nobody messaging me or calling. See, it helps to be a pessimist cos you don't get easily disappointed. Heh. This birthday officially sucks like all the others. Well, maybe except for last year.

Wait. Izzah Darling just messaged me! Yay! Haha. Thanks babe (:

Okay.. Now my brother just came into my room and gave me a big fat wet kiss on the cheek.
EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

But it still brought my eyes to be a bit wet la. Haha. I'm happy he's back from his stupid camp. Being here alone totally sucks.

Tomorrow, I mean today, will jalan with the SR peeps then on Wednesday with Fiza's group of people. In between them Sabbie will date me on Tuesday to watch Just Like Heaven to celebrate my birthday x). FINALLY!

Okay another interruption...

BIG :)

My mum and bro just came in singing the birthday song with cards and kisses for moi. I heart my family. I really shouldn't get all worked up over nothing before something happens. LOVELOVE <3 I like my brother's card:

To My Sister

Always remember...

Birthdays come and go,

but family is forever!

...

I know...

(it kinda scares me too!)

Happy Birthday

from ur bro Harris =)

Haha. Put a smile on my face. My parents' one is the sweeter type:

Happy Birthday, Daughter

...

With each year,

you grow

even lovelier...

and even more deeply loved.

From

Mum& Dad

Did I mention how much I <3 my family? (X

Happy Birthday Prince Charles!

Festival of Lights

2005-11-01T00:31:00.000+08:00

HAPPY DEEPAVALI!

I am now watching vasantham central and it is seriously interesting. All that dancing and singing. And they're also having this amazing race kinda thing which is in SERANGOON. I don't understand a word but I like.

Okay. I swear this will be the last(I hope) time I mention my retaining but I was thinking that this could be a blessing in disguise cos maybe retaindom=retainors? Hoho. Then I can kiss this metal away and have beauuutiful straight, white teeth. Hopefully white. And I'd only have to deal with retainors. Yeah man! That would be the life for me.

Was chatting to a certain Mr. Somebody just now and he's thinking of taking art next year cos he can draw a really nice fish. Haha. Total randomness but a funny inside joke :D

Another bit of randomness; I have settled on Soft Cell having made the nicest cover of Tainted Love which is the muse of this blog (like, DUH). Check it out if you wanna. Or for those pop people the Pussy Cat Dolls' one isn't too bad. Then of course there's Marilyn Manson and The Cure and The Ramones and.... Okay you get it. Its one of those songs that have that many covers.

If you want it that much then why do you keep pushing me away?

Indian guys can dance &
Kumar has really nice hair :O

I lurve my Sabbie Baybehh & HL bro & Dicky (:

Everlasting Regret

2005-10-28T21:29:00.000+08:00

Today I skipped school. Commemoration Day. Hurhur. But I heard I missed a few things such as; a certain future Singapore Idol Singing some Japanese song and 1000 miles and having the talent to strip on stage too. Woot. Hahaha. And also Mr Koh singing Better Man. Now that I do regret.

I was supposed to go to Fran's house for PW but somebody had to be 'sick' and thus, it was cancelled. So I ended up dressed with no where to go and I asked Bibs whether all the SR peeps were going anywhere and since they were going to Tamp I decided to join them. Haha. I think there's something wrong with us. We can play Uno or anything involving cards for hours on end.

Just being there with them fills me with so much joy yet so much pain. I remember at the beginning of the year we were all so happy that we would be taking the same subject combi and we were seperated nicely, 3 and 3. I realise I'm going to miss it a lot. Especially Izzah and Fatin Darlings. Haha. I won't have anybody to slack and suck at PE with anymore. Or anybody to hide behind the computer during lessons in the STINKY IT Rm5 with. All the lame and hyper high moments we sometimes had during lectures. Aarghh. When Bahar asked me what's wrong just now and mentioned that I looked as if I was lonely, I denied it but I guess he's right, I'm feeling the pangs of loneliness already. But I'm so proud of and happy for them for making it (:
LOVELOVE.

Let's all go watch the Legend of Zorro//Legend of Zorroza some day! We shall drag Miss I-Don't-Watch-Movies with us too. Hee..

Retaindom

2005-10-28T11:30:00.000+08:00

It's confirmed. I'm being retained. But I'm okay. I should be thankful for this oppurtunity to repeat year 1 and make full use of it. Hurhur. But seriously, I am kind of thankful. At least I'm not one of those 10 who got kicked out. I'm proud that I didn't cry cos that would be totally stupid of me but I did break down when I was hugging Bibs and Sitz cos they're most probably leaving to go to poly. I'm going to miss them SO MUCH. I am such an emotional nutcase.

Anyway, I am thinking of going to arts. Even my physics teacher agreed with me cos he's doing OP with us and said that I seem to be very strong in language. Haha. But that would be expected since I totally suck at physics. The question is what to take since there's a whole totally different system next year and also, how do I convince my parents. The reason I got into science in the first place was because of them. Bah. Now I keep thinking of Imran and his I-told-you-so's. Heh. Oh well, we'll see.

On the bright side, I DON'T HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL TILL THE END OF NOVEMBER. WEEEEEEEEEEE! Hahaha. But maybe I should just go for fun cos it'll be the last time I can actually say I'm part of 1s24. I'll miss my class a lot. Don't Forget Me! You'll still see me around and I'll try to sneak up on you people and shout HELLO. Haha and then you'll be glad I'm gone.

OOooh. Sugababes are on. Now someone tell me why I can't download a nice version of PushTheButton?

Toodles.

2005-10-24T00:28:00.000+08:00

So this is what it feels like.

Anyway, results out. Sucky as expected. Will definately not get promoted I think unless they do a thing like they did at SAJC where they promoted everybody even those who didn't make the mark. They get to be promoted conditionally. Funny that no one knows what they mean by conditional though.

PW is a stick up my ass. And there's been a switch of roles. Finally the written report has been handed up so I don't need to chase after my group members or pull out any of what's left of my hair out cos I'm not in charge of OP! Lalalalala. However, I'm slacking like crazy and I'm the last one to put in my part of the presentation. Hurhur. But I WILL do it. That's the difference.

So promos are over but it doesn't feel like it. School till 5 and blahblahs. Cikgu must really hate me. I haven't seen her in ages (or what seems like it) and Malay A's are in another, umm, 2 weeks? Yup, it seems that I can never unscrew myself. I will forever and ever be screwed and have a screwed up life.

Hari Raya is coming up soon. Got my bajus already. However, my room looks like hurricane Katrina just hit it. My mother is constantly nagging about it. But, I think she's given up already. This year might not be able to let people come to my house. Seriously. Haha. Even better though. I don't know why but I always feel so awkward when people come. Maybe its cos like the majority has never seen it before and I don't want them to judge my mum or whatever since she's the person who's mainly responsible for the way it looks. I love my home btw so there (:

Well, better get on with OP. I think I shall screw up the dry-run tomorrow for my group. Why the hell am I doing Intro and Conclusion when I'm not even the group leader? Haha. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY!

Oh God! Spare me! Jessica Simpson has just invaded the airwaves.

I am alone.I should learn to play twister

by myself too

Rumbly in my Tumbly :D

2005-10-12T21:46:00.000+08:00

I was about to give up today but I didn't. I'm so proud of myself. I shall not be stupid and dance again while puasa-ing.

Sometimes I don't really like fasting but on the other hand, there are so many blessings that come with it. I'm talking about food here no the usual cliche stuff like God's good will and stuff. The reason; I GET TO EAT YUMMY YUMMY FOOD!

WARNING : IT IS ADVISABLE TO READ THIS AFTER YOU HAVE BUKA-ED (:

My mum gives in easier since we're fasting and all and we've eaten alot of my faves. Had Fish&Co for dinner on the first day. Slurp! And then another day we went to Hawa and I had Beef Kuay Teow which I lurve with all my heart and soul (my mum can't understand how I can eat the exact same thing everytime we go there. hehe) and then there was the home cooking. Rendang by Nenek. Fish pie and spaghetti and and and so many more. Then my dad made his shepherd's pie recently too. I am living in food heaven. Is it any wonder why I never lose any weight during this period of time? Haha. I might have even gained some but I HOPEHOPEHOPE not :/

As for updates about school. NOTHING. Main thing is I have to concentrate on Malay and PW. Hurhur. My two favourite subjects. Oh and we're supposed to get our parents to put their names down for some commemoration day for students. AS IF! I'm not even going to get promoted so what's the point. Muahahaha. My parents are starting to get freaked out by the care-free acceptance i have of my fate because it is not in my nature. I would usually get the hysterics from panicking. But this is more fun. I feel more relaxed.

The End of Me

2005-10-09T11:15:00.000+08:00

Well, the promos are almost over. Last paper is tomorrow; ECONS P1 & P2 and what am I doing? Heh.

Physics sucked to the max. Should have practiced long-structured questions but even if I had wanted to take the easy way out and memo answers, I still would have sucked cos the stupid TYS only has some answers. Other questions they expect you to get it right. Its okay for those smart ones out there but not me. Blah.

I might even go to the extent of saying that maths was better than physics. Yes, I've gone mad. So now you know how screwed I am cos I have nothing that can push me up to JC2. Its all beyond prayers now. And I take full responsibility. Treated this like secondary school where you can still get promoted by the skin of your teeth. All play no work. Only REALLY started during the last 2 weeks. Tell me how is that possible?

I am now considering my options. I might do the Vin thing and go to MI where hopefully, they'll take me into their second year so I don't have to take the new syllabus and I still have more time to prepare for the A's. There's also the taking A's privately route which is worth considering. Sadly, poly is out cos it'll dry out my university funds and I WANT and NEED to go to university. So ya. Any other options?

I don't want to stay in SR if I retain cos I only find it bearable now because of the people. If I'm alone there without my friends I'd rather just drop out. Stupid I know. But still, I'm not into the adapting into a new crowd thing right now and there's also the humiliation. Heart over mind.

Promo Update

2005-10-03T20:51:00.000+08:00

Promos so far...

Malay
Why oh why didn't something like tenggelam punca or ular kepala dua come out for peribahasa? I can see the look on Cikgu's face now.

GP
Okay I guess. But summary was crap. What's new anyway. Heh.

Econs P3
HURHURHURHURHURHURHURHUR
Recite: WORK FOR MCQ. WORK FOR MCQ. WORK FOR MCQ...

Tomorrow's Mathematics. Please please let the things I've studied come out and no shit stuff like functions or curve sketching.

IPODNANO!

2005-09-24T13:37:00.000+08:00

Hello again. I shall TRY my best to make this my last last post until the end of promos.

But I just had to put this in! I was just doing my floating aimlessly around cyberspace when I came across this...

PRESENTING; IPODNANO
Isn't it just BEAUTIFUL? It is now on my lust list because it is so freaking nice. It's much lighter than the iPod mini and it is so freaking thin! It's about the width of an average wooden pencil. AND, not only does it store songs, it can store thousands of pictures. Now how great is that right? But, the sizes are only 2GB and 4GB but still, its not that bad. But don't worry my darling Zen Neeon. You still have a place in my heart. Besides, this is not even available in Singapore yet :/

Actually, Apple should be thanking me for advertising their product man. Or maybe give me a complimentary iPod Nano? Swoonswoonswoon...

Oh ya, it comes in white too but don't you think black is so much nicer?

Note To Self: YOU ARE ON HIATUS!

CRY

2005-09-21T22:48:00.000+08:00

I have this incredible knack of crying/doing something at the totally WRONG time. I'm just wonderful man.

I'm sorry for seeming petty. I feel horribly guilty :/

Thanks anyways <3

Shake It Off

2005-09-18T00:47:00.000+08:00

YOYOYOYOYOYOYOYO!

Okay. I know I'm not supposed to be doing this but like the many many other people in the world, I couldn't resist. The whole forbidden fruit theory, ya know?

Changi Airport seems to be our new found most favourite place.

A SOUVENIER;

Hahaha. We are mad people who attract interested looks from other people. And this leads to what this entry is supposed to be about.

We studied overnight at the airport last night at Macdonald's. 2 thumbs up to Fiza for staying up the whole entire time man. Me being the pig that I am gave up at 3 something and slept till 6. Sleeping at T2 Macdonald's is really comfy people! The sofas are LOVE. So, this method has proven not so effective for me. Furthurmore, my mum worries too much man. She called a few minutes after I woke up;

Mummy: Hello, you alright? We're coming.
Me: [sleepily] Huh? Coming where? Who's we?
Mummy: You're Dad and I are going to the airport.
Me: Why?
Mummy: [frustrated] To pick you up, silly head and to have breakfast and Swensons.

Okay, so I was extremely blur about it all but you have to understand that it is totally weird for my parents to be up on a weekend without any good reason to be so I was kinda put off balance by that. And I found out my mother hardly slept all night worrying about me. Haha. It's nice to know she cares so much but I feel bad about it all too so I shall not do it again any time soon. However, it was a nice experience nontheless so Fiza, Izzah, Halimah and Elfi, THANK YOU! (:

I Want You To Want Me

2005-09-11T03:02:00.000+08:00

I've gone mad. Shoot me now. I'm hardly studying with all this stay up till the break of dawn moments. Anyway...

I shall go on HIATUS till after promos. Hopefully.

But I couldn't resist coming online to say these 2 things:

I HAVE A NEW COMP!
Like finally man.

I HAVE A BLISTER ON MY FINGER!
The pinky finger no less. Now how the freak did it get there?

Kk. I shall go now. To passers-by, look up at the sky and observe the clouds. Do you see a cow-shaped one? Cos I did. 2 times in a row. Tomorrow, pigs shall fly.

Living On A Prayer

2005-09-09T00:57:00.000+08:00

Hey hey hey!

Oh man, first things first. I seriously need a new blog layout. I'm so totally not in my depressed, woe-is-me mood anymore. I LOVELOVELOVE Zorroza's layout + her totally uber funky tag board. She rocks lah at finding these kind of things (:

And another thing, I'm starting to become a rockhead. But I'm not into those underground never-heard-before types like Azie darling because yes, you guessed it, I have never heard of some of them. Hur hur. Anyway, they seem to make more sense because the lyrics make sense and they get you feeling. Oh, and I HEART Rockstar INXS so much that I cried when Jordis was eliminated today(yesterday).

Oh my, conference calls up to 4 plus in the morning to the max are wonderful man. With F & I & E. However, I feel wholly horribly guilty that I'm not studying or anything. Which is why I feel slightly better that tomorrow(today) I'll be studying with that Az & Diki. I HOPE I actually do study but I'm sure with Azimah there I will.

My brother is depressed. Over a girl. I've got to go cheer him up. Any suggestions? I'm totally useless in this department man. Oh wells, let me sleep on it for a while.

& what is that creepy ticking sound? Sounds like a frog. OH MY GOD there's a cyber frog in my brother's computer. Let's all run now.

I think I've gone mad. You don't have to tell me.

Signing out! LOVELOVELOVE <3

Beautiful Disaster

2005-08-26T23:20:00.000+08:00

Oh my freaking God. I'm a disastrously insecure person. It's no wonder why people misinterprate my actions and all. Anyway, let me clarify cos I don't like saying this out loud.

I don't like the feeling of being forgotten. Its my own insecurites that eat me alive you see. It's not really your fault, its my own heart that starts to sabotage my mind. So when I keep quiet I'm just trying not to think about it. I don't want to tell you what's wrong for fear of crying in front of you. I don't wanna say anything cos its awkward and it'd be kinda horrible talking about it. So just know that sometimes I need to be left alone / distracted. Okay? Hope you don't think any less of me for my queer ways of going about things.

Anyway, I'm oddly reminded of how when you see somebody that you think you recognise but you're not wearing your specs so you can't see properly and in the end you look like you're skowling at him / her. Hence, you will forever be known by the person as a ____. Heh. Interesting how the world works ay?

EVERYBODY'S JUST TOO OVER-ANALYTICAL!
Haha. Yes, including myself.

Hmm

2005-08-16T21:54:00.000+08:00

Okay. I just realised that this blog layout doesn't publish the titles of my posts. Just in case you're a bit lost, which I doubt since the meaning is quite clear, this was the title of the previous post,

Why Are English Guys So Freaking Cute?

Haha. Please feel free to comment (:

Why Are English Guys So Freaking Hot?

2005-08-16T21:33:00.000+08:00

Aaaah. Let me get a bit boy crazy for a while. I just watched this movie called Chasing Liberty starring Mandy Moore (hmm) and this kinda unknown guy, Matthew Goode, if I'm not wrong, and he is just sooooooooo cute and gorgeous and hot la. Anyway, I think one major factor contributing their hotness is their accent. Its just too swoon-worthy for words. Even in school their are a few swoon worthy people but their faces do not give enough justice for their sexy voices unforturnately. Oh well, they say that God is fair. But this guy I'm talking about, is just perfect in every way. Sigh...

Oh well, that's enough of that. Promos are in a few weeks, PW written report is due tomorrow and I'm doing this. I'm so freaking powderful lah. Happy mugging everyone else out there!

Footnote: I forgot to write about TPJC's DramaNight. I got to meet the usual beautiful suspects. I'll say Manifestasi was a better production than this and that means a lot seeing that my Malay isn't really up there. But that Hongkey Robert guy was funnayy. And guess what, he's somebody's boyfriend! Haha.

Second footnote: Dance is killing me (:

Breaking My Back; just to know you're name

2005-08-13T21:40:00.000+08:00

PW is S-H-I-T. Baskety baskety shit. I am so freaking happy I'm in charge of Written Report. And I'm also so freaking happy that 'in-charge' is taken so seriously since I'm the one who is 'in-charge'. Grrr

I think all the homework that is given to us now is enough to cover me in a mountain. How wonderful. Oh wow, how coincidental, I'm listening to I Predict A Riot by the Kaiser Chiefs. I wonder what the school will do then. Hurhur. They're really pushing us. Hopefully it doesn't come to nought.

So iLearning(140805) wasn't as slack as I predicted it to be. I mean it was simple enough but I had my dental appointment and dance practice (which was later to be cancelled but which I also rushed like crazy for -_-) so in the end I got Dicky to do my GP assignment for me. Haha. Yes, I owe you BIG time (:

Random thought #01: LITERATURE! Why oh why did I not take you?

So I finally watched Dim Sum Dollies today! Weeeee! It was funnnaayyyy! Haha. There were a whole range of issues. There was a part where there was this Expansions Centre (Instead of Expressions) where skinny/slim women wanted to become fatter/curvier and were like so ashamed of their skinniness/slimness. Haha. Here here, I say. No offense skinny/slim people out there. There was also something about how insignificant our Singapore Icons are as compared to other countries which although funny, holds much truth. Their was also mockery at the whole NKF thing and also how we should produce more children(which was quite dirty :p). There was a small part where Pam Oei performed this song about "If I fall in love, shoot me in the head" because all her past experiences were completely disastrous. Freaking hilarious I tell you. Haha. The other hilarious one was the Bollywood thing. Heh. Everything holds so much truth but you would never have thought to think of it that way.

So ya, I enjoyed myself. I'm a happy girl today (:
(Apart from the PW thing. BASKET!)

Had a Bad Day Again; you said I wouldn't understand

2005-08-08T23:30:00.000+08:00

Today when I got into the lift I pressed number 3 instead of 4 and still got out without giving a second thought. Now that's a sure sign that something is wrong.

I never get any good news. Let me sink into oblivion and be an unknown. Its so much better than being recognised and referred to for all the wrong reasons.

I didn't have any dinner and I just went straight to my room. I was reading 8Days when bro came in and was there to listen to and comfort me. I feel safer when I can expose all my emotions and stuff within the confines of my room and the only witness being my brother. Its easier. I don't like letting other people see me cry or whatever. It makes me feel ashamed of myself and also makes me feel vulnerable. Come to think of it, I can't even let myself laugh freely. There's something wrong with me. And I thought I had a happy childhood. Nonetheless, people do see me cry but luckily they're my friends and hopefully they don't judge me. I still hate doing it though. I feel like an emotional burden to others.

Anyway, so now, Harris is going to make me run with a backpack packed with bottles filled with water. It's all for my own good but I'm reluctant just thinking about it. Mind over body, Farah. But that's the problem! My mind can't even put itself to any task. Argh. I'm so frustrated with myself.

There were nice things that happened today but I can't bring myself to put them up. I'm not sure if I even remember what nice things happened. Please excuse my blog for being so melancholic nowadays. Do come back later.

Let's Try Again Shall We?

2005-08-08T00:56:00.000+08:00

I am praying that this entry will not go and delete itself like its predecessors. BASKET! Seriously. Anyway, first thing first,

I AM SO SORRY TO YOU ALL WHOM I WAS SUPPOSED TO MEET YESTERDAY BUT COULDN'T BECAUSE I'M SUCH A PIG AND SCHOOL HAS MADE ME THIS WAY.

I seriously do feel really guilty and I promise I'll make it up to you all. Please don't hate me :(

I haven't blogged in ages and I feel that I don't know how to anymore but then, how hard can it be right? Just spit out your feelings for the world to see. Good/bad? You decide. Thankfully, this blog isn't very publicised, thank goodness. But there are still times when you have to think twice before you post something up. I have also come up with a resolution. I shall not bore myself (&you people) by posting long rantings of what I've done today. I read other people's blogs and its just one long soliloquy where there seems to be nothing interesting to see. I mean I have nothing against people writing only for themselves but when you want to read your own writings don't you feel you'll be bored to death? I know I would. But I'm weird so you can't completely trust what I have to say. So, back to blogging...

DENIAL IS SHIT
Here are things I have long gone stopped denying to myself
[x]my physical appearance
[x]my smartness
[x]my common sense
[x]my conversations

I feel I am a failure as a human being. I'm stupid, I'm boring, I'm completely retarded sometimes and am an eye-sore. Now is it any wonder why I'm depressed all the time. I wish I could just be happy with myself but its such a hard thing to do. There's nothing to be happy about. And I'm a coward so suicide isn't an option.

I was having a conversation with my mum in the car and it was past midnight and I was overly hyper and then I asked, why did she name me what she named me. She said, "Don't you think it suits your character? I think it does perfectly, like now." She asked me could I imagine myself being a Jasmine for instance and told me to imagine what a Jasmine would be like. I said I only thought of Princess Jasmine (hur hur) but then I said it made me think of someone dainty and girly and she agreed. Thus, I realised I am so totally not a Jasmine. She said Farah is someone who's happy, outgoing, friendly and easy to get along with. "I think you're like that". Oh if only she knew man. Maybe I'm only like that around the family. Am I really like that in the real world?
But after that conversation I kind of really appreciated my name for once. There may be millions of Farah's in the world but how many Farah Hana's are there? She added the Hana so as to make me more rounded. She liked the Japanese ring to it and said it was nicer than the German's Hannah. Hana means flower in Japanese by the way. Its also supposed to mean beautiful. Unfortunately as I have finally come to realise a name doesn't make a person. You are what you are.

Enough about that. Its kinda saddening. Let me say I wanna watch Charlie and the Chocolate Factory but the thing is, when? I seriously feel like I have no time for anything nowadays. It totally sucks. I'm just so happy I only need to go to school next week on Monday and Thursday. And Monday is a half day so that's only 1 1/2 days in school. National Day + iLearning Day = LOVE

I need to go study now since, a) I NEED to and b) Promos are in another 8 WEEKS TIME! =/
Please pray for me

B - A - N - A - N - A - S

2005-07-23T11:11:00.000+08:00

I Just Feel SO Sleepy

2005-07-13T07:10:00.000+08:00

Ponned school today. Wee! Haha. This is what happens when you do you're homework into the wee hours of the morning and for company, you have your mother and Class 95. We ended up singing to Westlife songs. How pathetic is that?

Anyway, guess what? Fatin & Izzah didn't go to school either. I just can't wait to see the look on Gan's face tomorrow. Wonderful.

Let me update about the outing with the girls. Like finally man, really. Went to Parkway to have lunch. While waiting for the others I browsed around MPH. There are just too many books around. Unfortunately, there is little money in my pocket. Anyhoo, when they finally arrived, we went to Yoshinoya. EatEatTalkTalk & then there was this spontaneous decision to go to Bedok Princess to watch a movie. Fantastic4 was nice (which also made it easier to watch it AGAIN later in the day with my aunt). Then there was pool. I love pool but its just so sad that I SUCK. Haha. I have a video in my phone of me making a pathetic attempt to get the 8 ball in. Talking about videos, there's this funny video of Sab being Sab. I can't get enough of it lah. Haha.

I just LOVE our outings. Missing you all already! (:

SAY MY NAME; if no one is around you, say 'baby, i love you.'

2005-07-08T12:03:00.000+08:00

First and foremost,

SABBIE DARLING! I LOVE YOU BUNDLES HUN! (:
Please don't do anything foolish <3

Okay, that aside, I have 3 words. As I am about to break the news to my group members, I might as well type it here first. WE ARE SCREWED. Like totally.

Gan is a basket as usual. If only looks could kill, she'd be lying dead on the floor of A4-2 right now. Ugh. My group members and some of the other people in class saw the look that I shot her after she said what she said. I hope she saw because I honestly don't care. BASKET! I swear I don't hate anyone as much as I hate her. Actually I don't even hate anyone cos its such a strong feeling. BUT, I can verify that I do indeed positively, swear on my grandfather's grave that I hate her to the core.

Okay, enough. Let's move on to happier things. If only there was something. At the moment I can only think of how much I miss Lit. Yes, I've gone mad. Something is happening to me and I have no idea what it is. Anyway, I think I shall borrow/buy a Shakespeare play and read it for FUN. Now tell me I am not mad.

Oh, more bad news. My oral, or should I say lisan?, kinda sucked. I feel that the examiner in the red tudung kinda hates me or something. Anyway, after the oral thing we're supposed to go to the quarantine area. I started chatting to Nina and Anan/Anand (oops!) and later joined by Hilmi. Chatchatchat. Then we kinda got scolded by the teacher. Heh. Oops. At least that was something to cool me down despite the scolding thing. Argh. Let's just leave it as oral sucked for me. I hope I can at least pass. If not, then fail by very little?

To make things worse, I am aching all over because I had dance yesterday. 224 crunches non-stop. YAY. *insert pained expression here. But we did club jazz and it was groovy & sexy. Ooooh. Haha. I guess the reason I dread dance is because of the training aspect but after the whole thing is over, I just want more. I love it to bits. Nice way to ease stress according to the PE lecture. Yes, I did say, PE LECTURE. But whatever lah, as long as there's no real PE, right Izzah? Heh (:

I think I shall take my leave before I start drowning in sorrow. Again.

PS: I'm sorry to all those who had to go through my depressive moods. I shall try to be more cheery. I think I'm on the way and making good progress (: Thanks for being patient ya and being the people who can put a smile on my face <3

ALOTLIKELOVE; If You're Afraid Of Sounding Stupid Then You Don't Deserve To Be In Love

2005-07-03T13:20:00.000+08:00

My Shoutbox is being a bitch & therefore I have switched to CBox. Following Izzah's example. Hope you don't mind, babe!

Exams are O-V-E-R! HAPPYHAPPYJOYJOY! Like finally. BUT, I'm screwed. Shall not elaborate furthur in order to prevent depressive symptoms.

Seems like there are many things to get depressed about nowadays. Such horrible things happened that day. Did not to expect to make things worse. Gotta find a way to clear up stuff. Letter/Phone/Confrontation? I need Help&Guidance. I should see a counselor. My brother keeps threatening to phone one anyway. He thinks I'm going to commit suicide soon or something. Don't worry, Harris. I may be mopey but I'm not so brave. What's that in Malay again? Bedil Buloh is it? I think Cikgu is a good influence man. Haha. Surprised? Yes, so am I. Anyway, I've got to clear this up soon. Don't want to lose another friend. Especially this one.

Let's move on to brighter things! Watched ALOTLIKELOVE which is LOVELOVELOVE (: I loved it to bits! Oh how romantic and Awww-y it was! I loved the New Year's Party part. So When Harry Met Sally like. But I LIKE! I recommend you all watch that movie too. Its been so long since I watched a rom com. Much needed man. Much loved. However, this will lead to me beranganing alot now so please don't mind me when I zone out while you're talking. Haha. What's new anyways?

Anyway, I bought a new belt. Very shiny, very retro! OOOHHH! Haha. Jalan jalan-ed a bit at Orchard. Forever21 is LOVE. Retail therapy does wonders man. I can't believe how many times I've typed the word 'love' in this entry alone. What will I do next? Kiss my brother? ERRRRR. Wait long long lah. I'm not THAT blinded by happiness. But this is only temporary. I hope this lasts longer this time.

Okayyyyyy. TATA! LOVE! <3 (:

Please Release Me; Let Me Go

2005-06-23T16:14:00.000+08:00

I just went to see Engelbert Humperdink's concert. Oh man, I have no idea how to spell the name. Will edit later. Anyway, I went cos my mum was like really excited so I decided to accompany her. When I reached it was like full of senior people. I swear I was like the only teenager within a 10m radius. There were a few other young people. Emphasis on the 'few'. So, even though this Engelbert guy is like 69 years old, [ there were groupies at the end, comprising of old ladies! can you picture it? :D ] he was really entertaining and I enjoyed myself. The songs are also nice. I have to say that these kind of songs have lyrics that actually make sense. I'm glad my mum had a great time too. Its rare when she actually sees something that she really wants to watch. She's happy, I'm happy :)

Anyway, backtrack to earlier in the day when I had to pass the assless ass his wallet. Made me wait for like half an hour. As if I had nothing better to do. I was thinking angry thoughts thinking I would give him a piece of my mind but for some reason I can never be angry with him. Not only him but also my friends. It takes a lot of accumulated reasons to really anger me. I wonder where I get this patience from, certainly not from mum or dad. Haha. Back to the topic, as a result, I was late for our PW meeting. But of course, no matter how late I am I will never be later than Zhong. I'm kinda happy now that we're much futher ahead than what we started with. *heaves a sigh of relief.

Oh and after chatting with the guys I got to know of this really romantic plan. Awwwwww! Ask and I shall share ;)

I also forgot to mention that my darling com is not with me right now. I am using my brother's one with his BRAND NEW BROADBAND. Like WOW! Haha. He's so excited about it. Funny guy.

Kk. I NEED to sleep! More mugging to be done tomorrow!(Or should I say today? Heh.)

HEY!; Roll Over DeeJay

2005-06-22T01:59:00.000+08:00

Haha. I realise I always put a song I'm thinking about/ listening to as my title of an entry. Well, usually anyways.

I realise I shouldn't wallow too much in self-pity when my other friends are suffering from something even worse. Wait, that sounds as if its an illness. I mean they have worse problems in life.

Anyways, Darling Fiza, I'm here for you, we all are :)

But I shall rant and say one thing, which is, I feeeeeelll so unwanted. I'm always the last mentioned for some reason. No point mentioning me at all is what I feel. Unless, the last mentioned is the most important? Snorts. Who am I kidding. But that's how I feel. Said. Done. Let's move on.

She sent me a message explaining how she felt and all. I don't know how to reply. I need to time to absorb and figure out what I want to say. I cannot paint a rose coloured picture. There will definately be things that will not be pleasing to the ear, or in this case, the eye. The thing is tact.

Oh well. Haha. He's being chased by this psycho girl. The thing that comes to me first is, the song Stalker by Goldfinger.

Oh oh oh, she's following me
Oh oh oh, she's out of her tree
Oh oh oh, she's off of her rocker
Oh oh oh, I wanna marry my stalker

Hahahahaha. Freaking funny. Don't think he'll wanna marry this 'stalker' though. Lalala. This is totally random.

Tomorrow I have PW. Hopefully I can get some mugging done witht the usual SRJC muggers. Like after so loooonnnnggg. I AM SO SCREWED FOR COMMON TESTS! God, save me!

Heartbroken

2005-06-16T15:41:00.000+08:00

Doesn't it just blow? To realise that you are slowly losing people you love deeply. With every moment that passes, my heart is cracking just a bit more. I'm scared I've already lost some.

I guess the student profiling thing was right after all.

Freak. I miss them like crazy.

I realise I haven't seen any loved friend for a long time. A week for school darlings. I don't dare to count the time that has passed since I've seen the rest. A week is already killer for me.

I'm sorry.

Hanging By a Moment

2005-06-16T01:52:00.000+08:00

SighSighSigh. Like why? Why do I have to get so depressed. I wish I had no feelings then I wouldn't have to suffer. This totally sucks. I feel so invisible and non-existent. Ask me why and I'll say "I don't know". Seems like that's my favourite phrase now. Its annoying I know but I can't think. Nothing's clear.

Thought that I'd come back all hyped up from KL but I had to go see something that ruined my whole mood. It's something small. I don't know why it affected me so much. I guess cos I feel guilty & hurt at the same time. I feel so Kingshawy, people just suck. What I'd usually do is wait for the other person to cave in first, supposedly to show I'm stronger but I realise its stupid. Cos she'll definately not want to and it'll just be a never-ending story. I think maybe its stronger to make the first move. As the song goes, sorry seems to be the hardest word. Thing is I think I might cry. Aaargh. Why do I have to be so emotional.

Anyway, I'm super tired after dance today. Did handstands and a new street jazz routine. We all sweated like anything. Tomorrow, more handstands and cartwheels. I wonder if my arms can handle it. But at least I'm on of the few who can do a handstand on my own (: Finally, something to be proud of.

I think I'm ashamed of myself. Groans.

I think I'm drifting away; Please don't let me

MEMORIES; all alone in the moonlight

2005-06-11T02:08:00.000+08:00

I can't get that song out of my head. I still remember long ago when my family and me went to watch CATS in HK. I miss it. HK i mean.
Ice-skating, Water World & Ocean Park, Quarry Bay School, Our House & Garden, My Birthday Swing...
BUT... I'm happy here too so no regrets, just reminiscence :)

Anyhoo, another of my wants are soon to be striked out. Going to KL tomorrow! Woot. I'm so going to go crazy. Haha. Going with mum, bro, cousins, grandmama, aunties, etc. Oh whatever. Who cares who's going? What's important is that we're going! AAaaahhhhh!

I'm wondering whether I should pack some books. Common Tests start right after the holidays. Man, school sucks. BIG time.
Talking about hitting the books, went to study at the airport again today. What's up with that by the way? Most people when you say airport, you think HOLIDAY. Mention airport to us backward people, we think STUDY. Haha. Anyway, did math. Finally, log & ln make some sense to me. I know, I'm slow. Better late than never though.

Oh, and I'm such a basket. I overslept today so I didn't go to school. I wasn't scared about Math but more for PW. Oh man, my group is so screwed la. Oh no. I must be really worried cos its getting hard to swallow. *Breathe in, breathe out. HeeeeeHaaaaaHooooo. We seriously need help. Since Gan isn't being much help there MUST be somebody else.

Okay okay. I shall not think about this right now. I am going to relax and enjoy my upcoming holiday.

See you people! Have fun without me! (But not too much!) :)

*Why Can't People Learn To Say What They Mean & Mean What They Say?*

I Wonder If I Take You Home; Would You Still Be In Love Baby?

2005-06-09T15:57:00.000+08:00

Okay. I've finally got the link thing down. Haha. It was easy and I thought it would be some difficult thingy to do. I always get worked up for no reason.

So today we studied at Changi Airport again. Met the rest at Macs after dance cos they got kicked out of the canteen.
They all tried psycho-ing me by telling me they lost my MP3, My Baby! I obviously knew they were kidding but its fun how I psycho-ed them back my storming off to the toilet. Heh. So we strike each other out, right? No hard feelings.

Anyway, I did math. Its amazing to re-read what junk I write in my notebook during lecture when I can't help dozing off. Its embarassing. We also started berangan-ing about going to KL after our promos together-gether so we can shop til we drop together-gether. Cool idea. I want! BUT... I can foresee complications. If not with me then with the rest. Money, Parents, the like. But who knows? It COULD happen.

Tomorrow there's 3 periods of Math. How lovely. And then, there's PW with Gan. How even lovelier. Let me just pray I don't die.

Toodles.

OOoh WeEEee

2005-06-08T15:36:00.000+08:00

Yo!

I'm shagged! Like totally. No, not that kind of shagged LA! Tired, pooped, exhausted. But in a good way. Went swimming at JESC. Jurong East Swimming Complex. Ooh. So fantabulously cheap. $0.80. Woot! That's something for me to feel good about considering that I spent a bomb on Saturday with a $38 manicure & a $29 tankini (this was quite a deal, price dropped from sixty something. heee!)

Talking about Saturday, it was Drama's Masquerade Night. Most of the alumni went back. Can I just say that the new Sec 1s are so unbelievably childish it almost killed me. Chasing balloons in the assembly plaza. With their dresses on. MY GOD! Oh whatever. I'm just happy its not me who has to take care of them. I'm FREE! Haha.. But I miss drama-ing :(
Went there with Ams and Fiza after the manicure & shopping. Miss Sabrina Tan joined us after coming back from the ZOO for FREE ice cream! Oh, the cheapo! ;) But then, it was Ben&Jerry's so i understand baybehh!
There was a whole lot of hugs and camera-whoreing but me being smart (as per normal) did not bring my bimbo cam. Haha. Relied on Sabbie's cam & my handphone. Pathetic, I know.
Ooh! And the DIRTY DANCING! Haha. I swear we're the worst seniors ever. Explaing and demonstrating how to grind. & Carl wanted to try but we ran away. Kwakwakwa. That guy will forever be Mr Horny. I was teaching them how to ripple and shake it which helps, in Sab's words, to make the guy's noses bleed. Haha. Fun la.
Then me and Ams slept over at Fiza's house. FUNFUNFUN. Must do it again! And I wore PJs. Haha. I'm telling you its been ages since I last wore one. It was so nice to just slack around in them. They were silk! Oh the bliss!

Anyway, I'd like to elaborate on today but I shall not because I did a sinful thing which I shall not say because I do not want the wrong people reading this and tattling on me. Heh. This sounds so primary school.

Oh well, I NEED sleep! Zzzzzzz....

YEAH!

2005-06-02T02:29:00.000+08:00

Yoohoo! I am backkk!
So what do you think of my darling new layout? Aaah! I love it to bits! Its just so cute & innocent! LOVELOVELOVE. Sigh.
This thing is still under construction though as you can see from the link1,link2, etc. & my about me is pathetic too. I can't think of what to write. I feel like putting up a wishlist! Cos there's LOADS of things I want BUT I have NO MONEY! Never mind, in good time, in good time :)

ANYWAY,
Today was Daddy's birthday! I bought him a chocolate fudge cake from Prima Deli. I got a DISCOUNT too! Woot! The auntie doesn't know much though. She even asked me to help her calculate what the price would be after 10% discount. Bought mini cakes for Siti & Izzah darling too. The KAYPOS! Hehs. But I still love them x) OOOhh! And I got to use my FUNKY DUNKY DEBIT CARD for the first time! Haha. Cool! Signing my name on a receipt is FUN!
Got back home had a nice, nice dinner. French onion soup, Fish Pie, & of course THE CAKE! Daddy loved it! HAPPYHAPPY! When everyone's happy I'm happy.

I wanna bitch so badly BUT I shall not ruin this happy happy mood! Toodles! :)))

2005-06-01T01:55:00.000+08:00

Oooh! I have a BLOG! An actual blog! Not a LIVEJOURNAL! Hahaha. I finally feel like I belong! Weeee! I'm so lame. I wonder if this thing is idiot-proof for people like me. I'm such an un-techy person. I wanna turn IT-SAVVY. Kkk. I shall explore this thing. Updates later!

Previous posts @
www.livejournal.com/~entasis

But don't bother too much about it. Nothing very interesting :)